Stop Preaching NOFAP: Why I Hate Vegans.
28 January 2017 [link youtube]
Youtube Automatic Transcription
his view it does demonize sexuality it
does demonize the male orgasm of any kind and it presumes that women are in the role of being an obstacle to your real goals that women are detractors from your real goals your real ambitions that women and male heterosexual interest in women is something that destroys your mental energy your imagination your capacity to to do something meaningful in life to build your own business bill your future and that is in a subtle and profound way sick and evil and wrong in a logical and philosophical sense the flaw here is taking your own subjective experience of sexuality treating it as a universal standard and then looking at others and saying hey if you don't feel how I feel really secretly you do deep down inside you're in denial psychologically you guys are [ __ ] up what you're doing is bad and demented and wrong and Ted nothing could be further from the truth so how's life oh how's school I dropped out how's work I do YouTube now what what I'm live-streaming while I record this video two comments here right now one says this is a huge distract distraction from actual veganism and the second one says why is this even a topic so a few people are gonna watch this video who have no interest in veganism because you'll just see the title and you'll think hey here's a here's a critique of the the nofap phenomenon on the Internet but you may or may not know but with the in veganism as Emmet just said this is actually a huge distraction from veganism so what seven months ago now eight months ago when I was in Chiangmai I got death threats and threats of violence and defamation directed at me but one year before that so now almost two years ago the big crisis the big confrontation in Chiang Mai Thailand within the vegan movement was about nofap was actually people defaming and denouncing a one guy in particular a no fapper the movement in this and there were some of you are not old enough to remember this but about two years ago there was this ridiculous situation and durianrider threatened to beat this guy up and was making demeaning comments about on the internet and saying that he's you know he's not sir he's losing his mind because he you know he's not releasing enough tension so actually at several points the the nofa controversy has left to the fore has been the main thing that we've been debating in the vegan movement I made a comment below a video from Ted Carr the illustrious Ted car that I'll hear read the comment is is still up unless he's deleted it I wrote serious suggestion what if you just have a much lower sex drive than other guys and this is an ideology that lets you glorify that difference as if it were a virtue there are guys who can ejaculate ten times in a day without feeling the loss of energy that you ascribe to just one ejaculation I'm not glorifying either one as a virtue but it really sounds like you're misrepresenting a weakness as a strength and now I'll just mention hey showed up the Socratic method somebody asked asked a question in response to that that that led me to clarify what it is I'm saying somebody misunderstood and thought that I was claiming that having a low sex drive itself is a weakness and I'm not so I have a further comment I know it's specifically what Ted Carr describes feeling exhausted after he has an orgasm that's what I'm saying is a weakness he is describing and this is crucial to his his philosophy of of nofa his philosophy that men should withhold their their orgasms is his extensive description of a loss of mental energy above all else a loss of focus a loss of imagination a loss of any ambition to accomplish his goals all of this ascribed to just having one orgasm in a month one orgasm in a week one orgasm in a day is not typical that is not normal that is definitely not universal this is why I think actually the fundamental flaw in Ted Carr's reasoning and it's a fundamental flaw I think is widespread and this this nofap anti masturbation anti ejaculation subculture that bizarrely overlaps with the the vegan movement in a really weird way they take their own subjective experience of sexuality and turn it into a universal standard for all men and it's not you can look up at any peer-reviewed article a chart showing variation in male testosterone levels there's a huge variation now sexual desire and men varies for other reasons not just because of testosterone it can also vary because of how much zinc is in your diet and if you're a raw vegan if you're one on one of these really weird hippie diets you may not be getting enough zinc I have had times as a vegan what I had way too much zinc in my diet that can also happen but in responding to Ted car you know I start by taking his perspective seriously some people would listen to these speeches from take car and I listen to four of them now very carefully to try to figure out what his rationale for for nofap for refusing to eject of what his rationale actually is it's not easy to figure out although he complains that ejaculating causes you to lose focus the lack of focus in these videos is unbelievable so you know God maybe got to find a new method to be a little bit more coherent when you're on camera but the the two factors here again having really study whatever say number one the linchpin of his whole worldview is his subjective experience of a loss of energy through having a male orgasm and I take that seriously some people would watch that and think he's just lying would think he's making it up to justify the rest of this ideology and it's ultimately an ideology of sexual purity and masculinity and other things um I don't I take you seriously Ted I am willing to believe that that is how you experience male sexuality what why is there no capacity in you to recognize that that is merely a subjective and perhaps a typical experience in male sexuality there are men who have an orgasm and instead of feeling they have less mental energy feel that they have more why would that even be surprising and dude there are guys who can have 10 orgasms in a day and I don't mean fapping I mean full coitus the whole process of sex between two parties and have more energy more ambition more imagination I mean he's mostly talking about so-called mental energy who don't feel that as an obstacle as something draining their energies in life it only Stokes them up more would that surprise you Ted it's just as subjective as what you're claiming but it's not [ __ ] Ted and I don't want to venture a guess as to how many men fall into which category and how many men fall in the middle but what Ted is doing here I mean it's not dishonest but it is fundamentally flawed in the same way that for example a bisexual person a bisexual man might take his own experience of life and assume that it's universal and I have known I've known bisexual men and bisexual women and many of them can reflect that at some point in their lives maybe when they were a little bit more immature or engaging more wishful thinking they did think that a lot of bisexuals went through a phase where they looked at the world around them and thought all you people are bisexual everyone feels the same way I do but you people you people who are in the closet you people who either think you're 100 percent straight or under percent gay you're psychologically [ __ ] up you're doing it wrong you should figure out what I figured um and you know actually it's even nastier but you could meet gay and lesbian people who refuse to believe that anyone's bisexual who think that bisexuals are being dishonest either dishonest with themselves and a psychologically messed-up way that everyone is either really straight or really gay you can meet people who have these kinds of frankly deeply held misconceptions that are based on I mean it's based on the same thing that sympathy is based on that's why I say it's not insincere it's based on saying this is how I feel so I imagine I empathize I imagine that you feel the same way I feel and I don't I've had conversations and when it's with older and more mature people who are bisexual I remember having a conversation with a guy who was bisexual and he was saying well yeah but I assume everyone feels this way to some extent like everyone's on a spectrum and we're saying to him nope like I hate to shock you but some of us I don't know it doesn't even matter maybe a minority some of us actually are 100% heterosexual and I think by the way I think the fact that I'm at 100% I think it makes me more comfortable being around gays and bisexuals because it doesn't doesn't bother me I think maybe if you're if you're on the spectrum if you're somewhere in the middle you feel some ambivalence the guys you feel some ambivalence I can understand why they're uncomfortable like being in a shower with other naked men I don't feel that at all because that it's nothing to me to see a naked man to me is the same thing as seeing of a car or chair like it's just nothing but no I've had those kind of conversations people still look um and you know look I could make the mistake to the way someone could look at Ted Carr and say no this guy is deeply psychologically [ __ ] up he's in denial about his own sex drive I don't think that at all I think Ted is being sincere from his subjective point of view his experience of male sexuality about this terrible loss of mental energy fields but he's making the mistake of assuming that it's typical or normal or universal that this is the general case and that all other men should do what he does in order to have the little bit of focus and imagination and mental energy that he has and the second thing that I think is crucial to Ted's view of the world here and maybe to the no-fat movement in general maybe not there is a very peculiar kind of misogyny that comes out of this and the word misogyny is overused maybe I shouldn't use it all there's a very strange way of blaming women for your problem that comes out of this because his his view it does demonize sexuality it does demonize the male orgasm of any kind and it presumes that women are in the role of being an obstacle to your real goals that women are detractors from your real goals your real ambitions that women and male heterosexual interest in women is something that destroys your mental energy your imagination your capacity to to do something meaningful in life to build your own business build your future and that is in a subtle and profound way sick and evil and wrong here just listen carefully to what he says for for 30 seconds nothing you should never touch yourself again I think you should never have sex never orgasm again never I've never said that but when you don't do it so often you just have so much more energy up up top up here for the brain if so much more energy in your foot maybe you do Ted maybe you do your body you switch my life voice along with your body is so much more focused on other things in life then all of a sudden and you don't have to recover from the down that comes from orgasming you don't need to clean up the mess that comes after orgasm you don't need to help tell your imagination into [ __ ] some girl your imagination instead goes to instead creating business or critten life your dreams are creating your dream family for half did you catch that you don't have to waste your imagination on some girl you don't need to you know pull your imagination into [ __ ] some girl think about it Ted on a deep level you've let this demonization of the male orgasm itself extend into what's really a kind of misogynistic view of women that demonizes them and demonizes their role in your life as an unwanted obstacle to creating a beautiful garden pursuing your business and what-have-you and again my experience is very much at the opposite extreme and I'm not in such a small minority Ted there were tons of men there and/or successful businessmen who will tell you you know there they would never have been successful in business without this woman in their life supporting them I talked about that in an earlier video responding to rich Piana and what he says about about relationships so look it's bad it's evil it's sick and it's wrong and it's it's in a logical and philosophical sense the flaw here is taking your own subjective experience of sexuality treating it as a universal standard and then looking at others and saying hey if you don't feel how I feel really secretly you do deep down inside you're in denial psychologically you guys are [ __ ] up what you're doing is bad and demented and wrong and Ted nothing could be further from the truth there's a guy you may have heard of called Mohandas Gandhi make a Mahatma Gandhi famous political leader in India that guy had the most sick and twisted sex life imaginable there's a famous article in commentary magazine about that in English it was well known in the newspapers at the time but he raised this same issue that I raised like what is the point of no FAP what is the point of living in celibacy if you just don't feel any sexual desire anyway if you're not tempted if you're not turned on if you just have a low sex drive what's the significance of not having sex when you don't want sex and Gandhi his response to this actually was getting into bed with younger women some of them scandalously younger and he would in effect get aroused get an erection but not ejaculate it's this no fat [ __ ] that has really deep roots in all of the religions of India in Hinduism in Buddhism I'm not going to get into in this video but if you think this pseudo scientific style of thinking that somehow you're increasing your mental energy by having your sexual fluids pent up inside you this delusion has deep roots and these guys may be responding to [ __ ] from white Western yoga practitioners or white Western Buddhists or Hindus Reacher's of other kinds I don't know to what extent these guys are misled by those sources but there's definitely you could say there's a kind of Eurocentric view of nofap and there are also these deeper roots in Asian religions to it their deeper roots but they're also bad and dangerous and wrong my view of sexuality when I first got involved with Buddhism there was stuff in Buddhist philosophy that resonated with me because in Buddhism fundamentally sexuality is characterized as something that's kind of like an ever receding horizon something that's infinite but infinite in a kind of tragic and self-defeating manner so you know simple way to summarize the tera vaada Buddhist view of sexuality is it doesn't matter if you've had sex a hundred times you'll want to have it 101 times it doesn't matter if you have added 10,000 times you want to have a ten thousand one and that was something I could relate to you know this tragic sense of sexuality as as being something that can never be satisfied and where in some sense it's meaningless to to therefore to even try to satisfy now again maybe a TED car seems to be the opposite extreme but I remember back when I was back when I was much more into but his philosophy I have one day where I got together with my girlfriend and that day in total we had sex eight times that's not my personal best Ted it's not and when we had sex six times these are only the male orgasms were counting here the female orgasms are into the double digits or whatever and then I left to go buy some food and come back you can lose a lot of weight if you're in a loving relationship like this we're having a lot of sex because you forget to cook and you forget to eat and I left the apartments but went down the road and I remember thinking to myself because you know I was reading a lot of Buddhist philosophy at the time I thought wow so maybe for these 15 minutes maybe just now while I'm walking to the bakery and walking back again I won't feel any sexual desire you know me you know it was just kind of joking with myself these are my 15 minutes of nirvana right like okay fine like I should be so exhausted this doesn't even enter my mind and you know I again I just had to kind of smile on myself no on the way to the bakery it was good-looking woman next to me on the sidewalk and I think she just made eye contact with me and smiled at me a better so it's no big deal but let me tell you something I was interested on that instinctual level I was interested again in terms of his claim that you have a loss of energy or a you know loss of ambition or zeal I think I had more I think the fact that I'd had so much sex that one day I was probably more amped up I was maybe if I didn't have any said maybe I wouldn't even notice to her them eye contact wouldn't have sparked anything in me but I was I was not running out of spark and like I said I got the food I went back to my girlfriend's room and we had sex two more times that day we did we didn't total but to me I mean coming back to the original comment I left below the video what if this is just an ideologies that lets you glorify this difference ultimately a biological difference in your level of sex drive maybe your level of testosterone what have you why glorify this as if it's a virtue my point is not that having a high sex drive is a virtue is not to glorify a high sex drive is not to glorify a low sex drive I think we're just into a category of human sexual experience that has remained in the shadows at a time when you know the gay experience the bisexual experience when all kinds of other perspectives on sexuality have gone public it's much more rare even if you're sitting with a group of heterosexual guys to talk openly in a down-to-earth way about what it's like coping with a really high sex drive or like in Ted Carr's case what it's like coping with a really low sex drive you can look at you know the medical charts you got three standard deviations and more of testosterone levels in men there's just enormous biological variation and it has never been put into a category that got highly politicized the way gay bisexual and straight were so I think this is something that a lot of us I guess are still in denial about look Ted you may not believe me some of us can have sex eight times in a day and feel even more energetic and still be going for nine and ten and some of us can have loving relationships with women in our lives in which the women actually help us achieve our goal in which the women positively inspire us to achieve our goals in which like even if it's just having someone who cares about you and loves you and talks to you about your goals in life even if she's not involved like let's take the most stereotypical male only activity even if you were a dude and your passion in life is fixing up old cars you know these guys who have a garage and they buy a broken-down car from the 1960s and they [ __ ] repair the car yeah you know what there are very few women very few headers or who are into that there are some there are some it's very likely if that's your passion life is a man that the woman in your life is not going to be in the garage with you helping you fix that car but you know what your relationship with her can still be a wonderful positive motivating inspiring part of your life that even is positively helping you achieve that goal there is no reason to assume as Ted does here that these women are kind of like vampires you don't need to tell your imagination into [ __ ] some girl
does demonize the male orgasm of any kind and it presumes that women are in the role of being an obstacle to your real goals that women are detractors from your real goals your real ambitions that women and male heterosexual interest in women is something that destroys your mental energy your imagination your capacity to to do something meaningful in life to build your own business bill your future and that is in a subtle and profound way sick and evil and wrong in a logical and philosophical sense the flaw here is taking your own subjective experience of sexuality treating it as a universal standard and then looking at others and saying hey if you don't feel how I feel really secretly you do deep down inside you're in denial psychologically you guys are [ __ ] up what you're doing is bad and demented and wrong and Ted nothing could be further from the truth so how's life oh how's school I dropped out how's work I do YouTube now what what I'm live-streaming while I record this video two comments here right now one says this is a huge distract distraction from actual veganism and the second one says why is this even a topic so a few people are gonna watch this video who have no interest in veganism because you'll just see the title and you'll think hey here's a here's a critique of the the nofap phenomenon on the Internet but you may or may not know but with the in veganism as Emmet just said this is actually a huge distraction from veganism so what seven months ago now eight months ago when I was in Chiangmai I got death threats and threats of violence and defamation directed at me but one year before that so now almost two years ago the big crisis the big confrontation in Chiang Mai Thailand within the vegan movement was about nofap was actually people defaming and denouncing a one guy in particular a no fapper the movement in this and there were some of you are not old enough to remember this but about two years ago there was this ridiculous situation and durianrider threatened to beat this guy up and was making demeaning comments about on the internet and saying that he's you know he's not sir he's losing his mind because he you know he's not releasing enough tension so actually at several points the the nofa controversy has left to the fore has been the main thing that we've been debating in the vegan movement I made a comment below a video from Ted Carr the illustrious Ted car that I'll hear read the comment is is still up unless he's deleted it I wrote serious suggestion what if you just have a much lower sex drive than other guys and this is an ideology that lets you glorify that difference as if it were a virtue there are guys who can ejaculate ten times in a day without feeling the loss of energy that you ascribe to just one ejaculation I'm not glorifying either one as a virtue but it really sounds like you're misrepresenting a weakness as a strength and now I'll just mention hey showed up the Socratic method somebody asked asked a question in response to that that that led me to clarify what it is I'm saying somebody misunderstood and thought that I was claiming that having a low sex drive itself is a weakness and I'm not so I have a further comment I know it's specifically what Ted Carr describes feeling exhausted after he has an orgasm that's what I'm saying is a weakness he is describing and this is crucial to his his philosophy of of nofa his philosophy that men should withhold their their orgasms is his extensive description of a loss of mental energy above all else a loss of focus a loss of imagination a loss of any ambition to accomplish his goals all of this ascribed to just having one orgasm in a month one orgasm in a week one orgasm in a day is not typical that is not normal that is definitely not universal this is why I think actually the fundamental flaw in Ted Carr's reasoning and it's a fundamental flaw I think is widespread and this this nofap anti masturbation anti ejaculation subculture that bizarrely overlaps with the the vegan movement in a really weird way they take their own subjective experience of sexuality and turn it into a universal standard for all men and it's not you can look up at any peer-reviewed article a chart showing variation in male testosterone levels there's a huge variation now sexual desire and men varies for other reasons not just because of testosterone it can also vary because of how much zinc is in your diet and if you're a raw vegan if you're one on one of these really weird hippie diets you may not be getting enough zinc I have had times as a vegan what I had way too much zinc in my diet that can also happen but in responding to Ted car you know I start by taking his perspective seriously some people would listen to these speeches from take car and I listen to four of them now very carefully to try to figure out what his rationale for for nofap for refusing to eject of what his rationale actually is it's not easy to figure out although he complains that ejaculating causes you to lose focus the lack of focus in these videos is unbelievable so you know God maybe got to find a new method to be a little bit more coherent when you're on camera but the the two factors here again having really study whatever say number one the linchpin of his whole worldview is his subjective experience of a loss of energy through having a male orgasm and I take that seriously some people would watch that and think he's just lying would think he's making it up to justify the rest of this ideology and it's ultimately an ideology of sexual purity and masculinity and other things um I don't I take you seriously Ted I am willing to believe that that is how you experience male sexuality what why is there no capacity in you to recognize that that is merely a subjective and perhaps a typical experience in male sexuality there are men who have an orgasm and instead of feeling they have less mental energy feel that they have more why would that even be surprising and dude there are guys who can have 10 orgasms in a day and I don't mean fapping I mean full coitus the whole process of sex between two parties and have more energy more ambition more imagination I mean he's mostly talking about so-called mental energy who don't feel that as an obstacle as something draining their energies in life it only Stokes them up more would that surprise you Ted it's just as subjective as what you're claiming but it's not [ __ ] Ted and I don't want to venture a guess as to how many men fall into which category and how many men fall in the middle but what Ted is doing here I mean it's not dishonest but it is fundamentally flawed in the same way that for example a bisexual person a bisexual man might take his own experience of life and assume that it's universal and I have known I've known bisexual men and bisexual women and many of them can reflect that at some point in their lives maybe when they were a little bit more immature or engaging more wishful thinking they did think that a lot of bisexuals went through a phase where they looked at the world around them and thought all you people are bisexual everyone feels the same way I do but you people you people who are in the closet you people who either think you're 100 percent straight or under percent gay you're psychologically [ __ ] up you're doing it wrong you should figure out what I figured um and you know actually it's even nastier but you could meet gay and lesbian people who refuse to believe that anyone's bisexual who think that bisexuals are being dishonest either dishonest with themselves and a psychologically messed-up way that everyone is either really straight or really gay you can meet people who have these kinds of frankly deeply held misconceptions that are based on I mean it's based on the same thing that sympathy is based on that's why I say it's not insincere it's based on saying this is how I feel so I imagine I empathize I imagine that you feel the same way I feel and I don't I've had conversations and when it's with older and more mature people who are bisexual I remember having a conversation with a guy who was bisexual and he was saying well yeah but I assume everyone feels this way to some extent like everyone's on a spectrum and we're saying to him nope like I hate to shock you but some of us I don't know it doesn't even matter maybe a minority some of us actually are 100% heterosexual and I think by the way I think the fact that I'm at 100% I think it makes me more comfortable being around gays and bisexuals because it doesn't doesn't bother me I think maybe if you're if you're on the spectrum if you're somewhere in the middle you feel some ambivalence the guys you feel some ambivalence I can understand why they're uncomfortable like being in a shower with other naked men I don't feel that at all because that it's nothing to me to see a naked man to me is the same thing as seeing of a car or chair like it's just nothing but no I've had those kind of conversations people still look um and you know look I could make the mistake to the way someone could look at Ted Carr and say no this guy is deeply psychologically [ __ ] up he's in denial about his own sex drive I don't think that at all I think Ted is being sincere from his subjective point of view his experience of male sexuality about this terrible loss of mental energy fields but he's making the mistake of assuming that it's typical or normal or universal that this is the general case and that all other men should do what he does in order to have the little bit of focus and imagination and mental energy that he has and the second thing that I think is crucial to Ted's view of the world here and maybe to the no-fat movement in general maybe not there is a very peculiar kind of misogyny that comes out of this and the word misogyny is overused maybe I shouldn't use it all there's a very strange way of blaming women for your problem that comes out of this because his his view it does demonize sexuality it does demonize the male orgasm of any kind and it presumes that women are in the role of being an obstacle to your real goals that women are detractors from your real goals your real ambitions that women and male heterosexual interest in women is something that destroys your mental energy your imagination your capacity to to do something meaningful in life to build your own business build your future and that is in a subtle and profound way sick and evil and wrong here just listen carefully to what he says for for 30 seconds nothing you should never touch yourself again I think you should never have sex never orgasm again never I've never said that but when you don't do it so often you just have so much more energy up up top up here for the brain if so much more energy in your foot maybe you do Ted maybe you do your body you switch my life voice along with your body is so much more focused on other things in life then all of a sudden and you don't have to recover from the down that comes from orgasming you don't need to clean up the mess that comes after orgasm you don't need to help tell your imagination into [ __ ] some girl your imagination instead goes to instead creating business or critten life your dreams are creating your dream family for half did you catch that you don't have to waste your imagination on some girl you don't need to you know pull your imagination into [ __ ] some girl think about it Ted on a deep level you've let this demonization of the male orgasm itself extend into what's really a kind of misogynistic view of women that demonizes them and demonizes their role in your life as an unwanted obstacle to creating a beautiful garden pursuing your business and what-have-you and again my experience is very much at the opposite extreme and I'm not in such a small minority Ted there were tons of men there and/or successful businessmen who will tell you you know there they would never have been successful in business without this woman in their life supporting them I talked about that in an earlier video responding to rich Piana and what he says about about relationships so look it's bad it's evil it's sick and it's wrong and it's it's in a logical and philosophical sense the flaw here is taking your own subjective experience of sexuality treating it as a universal standard and then looking at others and saying hey if you don't feel how I feel really secretly you do deep down inside you're in denial psychologically you guys are [ __ ] up what you're doing is bad and demented and wrong and Ted nothing could be further from the truth there's a guy you may have heard of called Mohandas Gandhi make a Mahatma Gandhi famous political leader in India that guy had the most sick and twisted sex life imaginable there's a famous article in commentary magazine about that in English it was well known in the newspapers at the time but he raised this same issue that I raised like what is the point of no FAP what is the point of living in celibacy if you just don't feel any sexual desire anyway if you're not tempted if you're not turned on if you just have a low sex drive what's the significance of not having sex when you don't want sex and Gandhi his response to this actually was getting into bed with younger women some of them scandalously younger and he would in effect get aroused get an erection but not ejaculate it's this no fat [ __ ] that has really deep roots in all of the religions of India in Hinduism in Buddhism I'm not going to get into in this video but if you think this pseudo scientific style of thinking that somehow you're increasing your mental energy by having your sexual fluids pent up inside you this delusion has deep roots and these guys may be responding to [ __ ] from white Western yoga practitioners or white Western Buddhists or Hindus Reacher's of other kinds I don't know to what extent these guys are misled by those sources but there's definitely you could say there's a kind of Eurocentric view of nofap and there are also these deeper roots in Asian religions to it their deeper roots but they're also bad and dangerous and wrong my view of sexuality when I first got involved with Buddhism there was stuff in Buddhist philosophy that resonated with me because in Buddhism fundamentally sexuality is characterized as something that's kind of like an ever receding horizon something that's infinite but infinite in a kind of tragic and self-defeating manner so you know simple way to summarize the tera vaada Buddhist view of sexuality is it doesn't matter if you've had sex a hundred times you'll want to have it 101 times it doesn't matter if you have added 10,000 times you want to have a ten thousand one and that was something I could relate to you know this tragic sense of sexuality as as being something that can never be satisfied and where in some sense it's meaningless to to therefore to even try to satisfy now again maybe a TED car seems to be the opposite extreme but I remember back when I was back when I was much more into but his philosophy I have one day where I got together with my girlfriend and that day in total we had sex eight times that's not my personal best Ted it's not and when we had sex six times these are only the male orgasms were counting here the female orgasms are into the double digits or whatever and then I left to go buy some food and come back you can lose a lot of weight if you're in a loving relationship like this we're having a lot of sex because you forget to cook and you forget to eat and I left the apartments but went down the road and I remember thinking to myself because you know I was reading a lot of Buddhist philosophy at the time I thought wow so maybe for these 15 minutes maybe just now while I'm walking to the bakery and walking back again I won't feel any sexual desire you know me you know it was just kind of joking with myself these are my 15 minutes of nirvana right like okay fine like I should be so exhausted this doesn't even enter my mind and you know I again I just had to kind of smile on myself no on the way to the bakery it was good-looking woman next to me on the sidewalk and I think she just made eye contact with me and smiled at me a better so it's no big deal but let me tell you something I was interested on that instinctual level I was interested again in terms of his claim that you have a loss of energy or a you know loss of ambition or zeal I think I had more I think the fact that I'd had so much sex that one day I was probably more amped up I was maybe if I didn't have any said maybe I wouldn't even notice to her them eye contact wouldn't have sparked anything in me but I was I was not running out of spark and like I said I got the food I went back to my girlfriend's room and we had sex two more times that day we did we didn't total but to me I mean coming back to the original comment I left below the video what if this is just an ideologies that lets you glorify this difference ultimately a biological difference in your level of sex drive maybe your level of testosterone what have you why glorify this as if it's a virtue my point is not that having a high sex drive is a virtue is not to glorify a high sex drive is not to glorify a low sex drive I think we're just into a category of human sexual experience that has remained in the shadows at a time when you know the gay experience the bisexual experience when all kinds of other perspectives on sexuality have gone public it's much more rare even if you're sitting with a group of heterosexual guys to talk openly in a down-to-earth way about what it's like coping with a really high sex drive or like in Ted Carr's case what it's like coping with a really low sex drive you can look at you know the medical charts you got three standard deviations and more of testosterone levels in men there's just enormous biological variation and it has never been put into a category that got highly politicized the way gay bisexual and straight were so I think this is something that a lot of us I guess are still in denial about look Ted you may not believe me some of us can have sex eight times in a day and feel even more energetic and still be going for nine and ten and some of us can have loving relationships with women in our lives in which the women actually help us achieve our goal in which the women positively inspire us to achieve our goals in which like even if it's just having someone who cares about you and loves you and talks to you about your goals in life even if she's not involved like let's take the most stereotypical male only activity even if you were a dude and your passion in life is fixing up old cars you know these guys who have a garage and they buy a broken-down car from the 1960s and they [ __ ] repair the car yeah you know what there are very few women very few headers or who are into that there are some there are some it's very likely if that's your passion life is a man that the woman in your life is not going to be in the garage with you helping you fix that car but you know what your relationship with her can still be a wonderful positive motivating inspiring part of your life that even is positively helping you achieve that goal there is no reason to assume as Ted does here that these women are kind of like vampires you don't need to tell your imagination into [ __ ] some girl