So, You're Planning on Turning 40?
06 May 2019 [link youtube]
Youtube Automatic Transcription
so I'm closing in on my 60-day tenure as
a as a 40 year old adult man and it's only right that I give my assessment on what life is like at 40 minute all right so we have our milestones you know everybody looks toward or everybody looks forward to being 16 years old and and getting a driver's license then everybody looks toward being 18 then 21 you know being able to buy buy alcohol or whatever but but hitting 40 man hitting 40 is is life-changing and I've noticed so many things that have changed around me inside of me the latter the last 60 days man it's unreal and I think that 40 is one of the most most misunderstood one of the most unappreciated ageist man that will ever hit at least for me when I look at pictures of say somebody and their 40s or 50s or even in their 60s that still looks amazing if there's an image of them on the Internet and then you go and read the comments so many of those comments are negative so much of it is why are you shouldn't be wearing a bikini at that age put it away you're too old for that I often get questions about shorts and specifically wearing shorts over 40 you don't have to wear shorts period and a story many women no one wear shorts many of you may have issues with your legs maybe you have a lot of moles maybe have spider veins maybe of cellulite maybe you have thicker calves that you don't like or feel comfortable with maybe you have bruises I don't know what the case may be there are a zillion things that could make you feel self-conscious about showing your legs so don't feel like you have to wear shorts let me smell young now I say just go in my mouth it's been eight months since I turned 40 okay nobody told me that 40 is such a critical age okay now we hear about changing jobs at 40 and you know we revamping your life and lifestyle whatever happy but again people sugarcoat things let me tell you the real deal forty means you want everything new everything changed you want a new wardrobe you want a new hairstyle hair color you wanna just change everything about who you are your personality you want to change it job you want to change your friends you want to change everything so this is 40 it's a strange number because you are supposed to be I'm saying you you're a grown-up but I don't feel like a grown I have grown-up responsibilities but I still don't feel like a grown-up I think when I look back over my 30s and from a physical point of view I have I probably spent 10,000 pounds on Botox in my 30s up the way to around about 38 at least 10,000 pounds on Botox it's my birthday today I am officially 40 years old I don't have any negative associations with turning 40 I feel very happy with where I am in my life I don't have any issues with turning 40 I like the way I look I've already had my kids you know and they're at like a really fun age where they're like you know little humans and we get to do cool stuff together and I'm just I'm glad I had them younger I'm glad I'm not just starting out having kids now although I know that's preferable to a lot of women these days and yeah that's right if I can look good and I know it okay I know it I probably spend ten thousand pounds on Botox but not once all about money in my forehead not once did it make me look a single day younger than I lost see I've always heard people say stuff like you know 40 is the new 30 you know I've heard that you know for so many years man but but now that I'm 40 I get confused man because you know I can't understand the mindset you have to be in to even make a comment like that 40 is the new 40 you've been doing whatever you've been doing for 20 years career style whatever happy for about 20 years technically yeah you cut your hair and yeah your diet or whatever have you but nothing drastic nothing major really for about 20 years 40 times is man it's just changes you totally then at least for women for the most part your libido goes up you want sex all the time unless yourself not every female of course but for most females you want sex all the time you are at your peak you are up there so you're ready to hump anything dry/wet you don't care something happens to your hormones I'm not sure what it is it started happening in my late 30s where I don't know what it is but [ __ ] just sex is better like way way way way way way better than it was when you were 25 if a woman first of all if a woman is in her 40s and she's wearing a bikini on the beach you I read the comments that say you shouldn't be wearing that it's time for a one-piece you need to cover up nobody wants to see that but it's worse if you're a mom I see a lot of this you're a mom now you shouldn't be showing that you're a mom now you shouldn't be doing this I mean if I didn't live in South Texas I probably wouldn't wear shorts or would wear them very infrequently here are some guidelines that I hope will help you in making your selections because I don't know I mean I never were super super short shorts never never never but I do see a lot of girls these days wearing you know just like the really really short cut off denim shorts that show even like the curve of your behind and they can get away with that kind of because they're in their early 20s or even younger my point being the days of short short short short shorts when you're 35 40 45 50 55 60 those are gone they're gone can't do it not appropriate not appropriate for age I don't care how hot and sexy your legs are of course everybody is entitled to their opinions and they might feel like once you are a mother that you shouldn't be showing a certain amount of skin you shouldn't be wearing miniskirts and that is each individual person's prerogative if that's the way they feel they are entitled to those feelings but I have always been of the mindset to not judge I'm not gonna judge it the way a person is as a mother by the clothing that they wear getting back to why I love being in my 40s is because now I don't really give a crap about what other people think of me and that's okay so that's another good thing about turning 40 is like you're confident and like you really don't care what other people think and you just you just don't give a [ __ ] you're really comfortable in your own skin that's that's another good thing about turning 40 that you might not realize if you're not there yet women at this age up until 15 in the menopause before the menopause and all that stuff your libido goes up so you are humping everything going and you want something young fun lie because again you've been doing whatever you've been doing for at least 20 years so yeah you know you wanna have fun my overall assessment man III really think that that you know us hitting 40 and as a people is where we're dropping the ball 40 is the new 40 see we're quick to talk about a young man man when we see them walking through the malls with with the pants hanging out down or we see young women on the malls acting up not just man with the with the butt cheeks hanging out a lot man but but if we aren't part of the solution man then we're part of the problem if my daughter walks out of the house wearing shorts like that she will not leave I will lock her in the closet and she will change but my boy means these young people man they're looking for guidance they're looking for goddess and direction man but but they don't have anywhere to get it except music videos and reality TV see what what we as as older adults see is entertainment they look at that and they think that you know this is how I'm supposed to be I definitely have spent a lot of time in the Sun and I'm a little bit lizard like in the skin area that's very apparent that I've enjoyed the Sun in my life but I mean who gives a [ __ ] with all these snapchat filters you know you can basically just let your skin go to [ __ ] and [ __ ] throw a snapchat filter on that and look [ __ ] you know dope as [ __ ] you want to go WOW you want to do things you wanna you know feel young and sexy that's another thing you you want validation nobody told me that at 40 single Mary I don't care what it is across the board 40 years Oh for some reason seems like you want validation you can just look like you're you know fresh clean baby skin like they have all of those amazing filters so basically like that's you know not an issue the skin thing isn't an issue anymore of course I've experienced that as well the fine lines that show up the sun damage on my chest the knees don't look the same as they did 20 years ago the elbows the hands you notice all of these changes and they can really get you down but these days being in your 40s isn't like what your grandma's 40s looked like we are taking such better care of ourselves we know so much more about the importance of diet and exercise and staying out of the Sun and all of these amazing new anti-aging products that have come out in the market and yes there's injectables like Botox and fillers and there's things that I feel when done in moderation little tweaks here and there can make you feel really really good about yourself now some of you might be saying well you know the one hand reset you just said that you don't really care about what other people think but then you're saying that you do care about your appearance well yeah they don't have to be mutually exclusive you want to know that you're pretty get your desirable that you're wanted that somebody from across the street down the block is looking at you I don't know what it is or why and maybe our bodies are getting us for menopause and so forth so maybe it's like another little life change but you want to know that you're you're wanted you're needed I want to walk down the street people drop their mouth because I'm looking so good in my little and my little black all-black uniform dude I'm saying but that's how ridiculous it is boy I wanted that I wanted to be wanted I wanted to be needed I wanted um somebody to come on but I get beautiful just out the blue yeah beautiful I couldn't live without you man if you was my woman and that's partly why a lot of older women around my age and older I'll see it at the club's all naked and freaky deaky you have a sex or really Milly and all these different things because they want validation it's not like I'm 25 and I'm going out to nightclubs and I'm like concerned with like trying to be cool and it's like I don't know what my passion is and I don't know what I want to do with my life and I'm still in that phase where you're attracted to like [ __ ] guys and stuff I think that being in your 40s makes you more grateful it makes you more aware of every day and the beauty of being given another day and to not take any day for granted I just feel like the older and wiser the idea of being older and wiser really is true if we know what life is like man why aren't we why aren't we telling them what we know man why are we pulling them to the side says hey you know what young man young lady this is what life about is about man you know you're 21 you're 22 here in the next 10-15 years this is what you're gonna be experiencing I mean that they may rebel man but like I said before man they're wanting that guidance man another good thing about being 40 and now I don't know if this is true for everyone is that when I was 20 I was a little bit of an [ __ ] now that I'm 40 I [ __ ] I'm not an [ __ ] anymore now this I'm reminded of cuz I follow a lot of little [ __ ] on Instagram and they're still in that phase where they're like I'm young I'm gonna do what's right for me and [ __ ] everyone else and then it's super cool not to give a [ __ ] there's still in that face and I remember being in that fair so I've got nothing but love for you you little [ __ ] as me and you know why aren't we going to the young guy saying hey you know what man you know it's cool to be smart man it's it's cool to read man it's cool to expand your mind and I just feel like we're dropping the ball man we're really setting them up for failure man and I think that one of the responsibilities of being 40 is it is being able to you know look back and explain to them hey this is what life is about thank you for watching I'll see you soon leave a comments down there well the happy birthday one so that's nice but leave your comments in general what do you feel how you feel way thought you'd be at the age you wanna be call the read thank so much as ridiculous as that montage may have been it gives you a sense of the range of the opinions you can find on the internet on the topic of turning 40 and let me tell you something if you search around instead for videos on the topic of what it's like to turn 16 or what it's like to turn 21 you are gonna find many many more opinions here on YouTube there are very very few people who've taken the time to come on camera and talk about what it's like to turn 40 because not too many of us are youtubers are preserving our life sharing it with the public for the people to scrutinize at age 40 be that as it may what I looked at the history of my own youtube channel here it's always been striking to me that one of my most successful videos of all time is simply me talking about why I don't drink alcohol and that tells you something but the social function of the Internet in YouTube in particular 2018 I told the anecdote recently on this channel about a friend of mine it became vegan and when she decided to become vegan she had this shocking short-term experience where she opened a box of chicken chicken meat and happened to be accidentally some chicken feathers left in there but who did she turn to for help or guidance after she had this horrifying discovery she didn't go to her priest she didn't go to work father or her uncle shouldn't go to a Buddhist monk she to go to some traditional authority figure she came here on YouTube and started looking for advice and this led her eventually to make the decision to become vegan so in same way there were people a 22,000 people most of them never heard of me before most of them never watched my videos gonna have to work twenty-two thousand people came to my channel to hear me talk for eighteen minutes about why I don't drink alcohol um what goes into that decision was tied up to that in my life so whatever else I reflected on that video so you know this some truth those reflections that were that were edited into that montage that part of what's going on here is indeed the older generation sharing their experiences and passing on some kind of guidance and advice to the younger generation what else do we have in the video look I'm not trying to make any of these people look ridiculous but sure there are different moments in there I laugh that um it sure is ridiculous to hear that what really matters they forty is I don't know how attractive you are how great your sex life is or how well you've been able to you know manage some kind of concoction of healing elixirs diet and Botox births but you know something else have mentioned here on YouTube is that you know I did live long enough in life that I managed to read one of the major works of Aristotle Aristotle the ancient Greek philosopher I managed to read his book simply titled politics back when I was about 19 years old and then of the reading again now at age 39 going on 40 and I'm someone who is both blessed and cursed with a very accurate memory it's a curse because traumatic experiences in your life stay with you more vividly than someone who can just forget someone who maybe just remembers the outlines of things but while reading that work of aristotle's now and what I see in it what I appreciate in it what I criticize about it what I can excoriate about it how I see the structure of the text the content of the text the way I make leaps of inference about the intention of the author the way I see it as a product of its social and historical context all of that has changed so much and I'm confronted with the memory of the man I was or the boy I was at age 19 when I read it and somebody won't be surprised by this at all it's 19 I absolutely could not get past the fact that Aristotle makes excuses for slavery and you ignored nor should I have courted anyone it's horrifying to read this guy who celebrated as a genius who's presented as the pinnacle of you know Western intellectual accomplishment making excuses for the ownership and exploitation of slaves that I still think today anyone on the schoolyard at least any high school student could refute or challenge and of course here I am age 39 and still to this day I'm dealing with similarly childish excuses for yeah you know war the brutality of governments locally and internationally but above all else as you guys know the main thing I've been involved in politics last five years have been the excuses people make for eating meat for perpetuating the culture of you know meat dairy leather etc challenging that from a vegan perspective although I've tried also in my way to challenge preconceptions that people have when they're making excuses for communism when they're making excuses for other kinds of brutality of a man against man shall we say so this is it guys forty years old I talked to a friend of me of mine a few days ago and he was explaining that he was quoting YouTube for various reasons he has aspirations to be an author spend more time writing he has a new girlfriend it's having more sex these are not reasons to quit the game you know you can have a very active sex life you can have very active intellectual life as an author as so as a reader as a student as a teacher would have you and there's not reasons to quit doing YouTube you know above all else from day one on this YouTube channel I knew what was leaving behind an artifact for my daughter to see one day because my daughter may only get to know me if I live that long when I'm in my 60s and there won't be something left behind of the man I was in my 40s in that more active time of my life and I mean I could say honestly if I was only getting 10 views per video if I was getting a tiny tiny number of viewers it would still be worthwhile for me to come here on YouTube and share the ridiculous contradictions and struggles that are ongoing in my life so guys whether you subscribe or not whether you can watch minutes or not but he's far beyond patreon or not I think I can say and I'll deal honestly we don't know what's gonna happen with technology in the future the internet but for me looking forward despite all the real harm and sorrow that YouTube has brought into my life as it has has brought a lot I can say I feel more committed than ever to to try to share the the unexpected developments in my life my only philosophy experience whatever it is about this you're on the Internet thanks for tuning in bye-bye I mean really people like to disrespect my truth but the fact is that you know my name is I don't know you I vanished en
a as a 40 year old adult man and it's only right that I give my assessment on what life is like at 40 minute all right so we have our milestones you know everybody looks toward or everybody looks forward to being 16 years old and and getting a driver's license then everybody looks toward being 18 then 21 you know being able to buy buy alcohol or whatever but but hitting 40 man hitting 40 is is life-changing and I've noticed so many things that have changed around me inside of me the latter the last 60 days man it's unreal and I think that 40 is one of the most most misunderstood one of the most unappreciated ageist man that will ever hit at least for me when I look at pictures of say somebody and their 40s or 50s or even in their 60s that still looks amazing if there's an image of them on the Internet and then you go and read the comments so many of those comments are negative so much of it is why are you shouldn't be wearing a bikini at that age put it away you're too old for that I often get questions about shorts and specifically wearing shorts over 40 you don't have to wear shorts period and a story many women no one wear shorts many of you may have issues with your legs maybe you have a lot of moles maybe have spider veins maybe of cellulite maybe you have thicker calves that you don't like or feel comfortable with maybe you have bruises I don't know what the case may be there are a zillion things that could make you feel self-conscious about showing your legs so don't feel like you have to wear shorts let me smell young now I say just go in my mouth it's been eight months since I turned 40 okay nobody told me that 40 is such a critical age okay now we hear about changing jobs at 40 and you know we revamping your life and lifestyle whatever happy but again people sugarcoat things let me tell you the real deal forty means you want everything new everything changed you want a new wardrobe you want a new hairstyle hair color you wanna just change everything about who you are your personality you want to change it job you want to change your friends you want to change everything so this is 40 it's a strange number because you are supposed to be I'm saying you you're a grown-up but I don't feel like a grown I have grown-up responsibilities but I still don't feel like a grown-up I think when I look back over my 30s and from a physical point of view I have I probably spent 10,000 pounds on Botox in my 30s up the way to around about 38 at least 10,000 pounds on Botox it's my birthday today I am officially 40 years old I don't have any negative associations with turning 40 I feel very happy with where I am in my life I don't have any issues with turning 40 I like the way I look I've already had my kids you know and they're at like a really fun age where they're like you know little humans and we get to do cool stuff together and I'm just I'm glad I had them younger I'm glad I'm not just starting out having kids now although I know that's preferable to a lot of women these days and yeah that's right if I can look good and I know it okay I know it I probably spend ten thousand pounds on Botox but not once all about money in my forehead not once did it make me look a single day younger than I lost see I've always heard people say stuff like you know 40 is the new 30 you know I've heard that you know for so many years man but but now that I'm 40 I get confused man because you know I can't understand the mindset you have to be in to even make a comment like that 40 is the new 40 you've been doing whatever you've been doing for 20 years career style whatever happy for about 20 years technically yeah you cut your hair and yeah your diet or whatever have you but nothing drastic nothing major really for about 20 years 40 times is man it's just changes you totally then at least for women for the most part your libido goes up you want sex all the time unless yourself not every female of course but for most females you want sex all the time you are at your peak you are up there so you're ready to hump anything dry/wet you don't care something happens to your hormones I'm not sure what it is it started happening in my late 30s where I don't know what it is but [ __ ] just sex is better like way way way way way way better than it was when you were 25 if a woman first of all if a woman is in her 40s and she's wearing a bikini on the beach you I read the comments that say you shouldn't be wearing that it's time for a one-piece you need to cover up nobody wants to see that but it's worse if you're a mom I see a lot of this you're a mom now you shouldn't be showing that you're a mom now you shouldn't be doing this I mean if I didn't live in South Texas I probably wouldn't wear shorts or would wear them very infrequently here are some guidelines that I hope will help you in making your selections because I don't know I mean I never were super super short shorts never never never but I do see a lot of girls these days wearing you know just like the really really short cut off denim shorts that show even like the curve of your behind and they can get away with that kind of because they're in their early 20s or even younger my point being the days of short short short short shorts when you're 35 40 45 50 55 60 those are gone they're gone can't do it not appropriate not appropriate for age I don't care how hot and sexy your legs are of course everybody is entitled to their opinions and they might feel like once you are a mother that you shouldn't be showing a certain amount of skin you shouldn't be wearing miniskirts and that is each individual person's prerogative if that's the way they feel they are entitled to those feelings but I have always been of the mindset to not judge I'm not gonna judge it the way a person is as a mother by the clothing that they wear getting back to why I love being in my 40s is because now I don't really give a crap about what other people think of me and that's okay so that's another good thing about turning 40 is like you're confident and like you really don't care what other people think and you just you just don't give a [ __ ] you're really comfortable in your own skin that's that's another good thing about turning 40 that you might not realize if you're not there yet women at this age up until 15 in the menopause before the menopause and all that stuff your libido goes up so you are humping everything going and you want something young fun lie because again you've been doing whatever you've been doing for at least 20 years so yeah you know you wanna have fun my overall assessment man III really think that that you know us hitting 40 and as a people is where we're dropping the ball 40 is the new 40 see we're quick to talk about a young man man when we see them walking through the malls with with the pants hanging out down or we see young women on the malls acting up not just man with the with the butt cheeks hanging out a lot man but but if we aren't part of the solution man then we're part of the problem if my daughter walks out of the house wearing shorts like that she will not leave I will lock her in the closet and she will change but my boy means these young people man they're looking for guidance they're looking for goddess and direction man but but they don't have anywhere to get it except music videos and reality TV see what what we as as older adults see is entertainment they look at that and they think that you know this is how I'm supposed to be I definitely have spent a lot of time in the Sun and I'm a little bit lizard like in the skin area that's very apparent that I've enjoyed the Sun in my life but I mean who gives a [ __ ] with all these snapchat filters you know you can basically just let your skin go to [ __ ] and [ __ ] throw a snapchat filter on that and look [ __ ] you know dope as [ __ ] you want to go WOW you want to do things you wanna you know feel young and sexy that's another thing you you want validation nobody told me that at 40 single Mary I don't care what it is across the board 40 years Oh for some reason seems like you want validation you can just look like you're you know fresh clean baby skin like they have all of those amazing filters so basically like that's you know not an issue the skin thing isn't an issue anymore of course I've experienced that as well the fine lines that show up the sun damage on my chest the knees don't look the same as they did 20 years ago the elbows the hands you notice all of these changes and they can really get you down but these days being in your 40s isn't like what your grandma's 40s looked like we are taking such better care of ourselves we know so much more about the importance of diet and exercise and staying out of the Sun and all of these amazing new anti-aging products that have come out in the market and yes there's injectables like Botox and fillers and there's things that I feel when done in moderation little tweaks here and there can make you feel really really good about yourself now some of you might be saying well you know the one hand reset you just said that you don't really care about what other people think but then you're saying that you do care about your appearance well yeah they don't have to be mutually exclusive you want to know that you're pretty get your desirable that you're wanted that somebody from across the street down the block is looking at you I don't know what it is or why and maybe our bodies are getting us for menopause and so forth so maybe it's like another little life change but you want to know that you're you're wanted you're needed I want to walk down the street people drop their mouth because I'm looking so good in my little and my little black all-black uniform dude I'm saying but that's how ridiculous it is boy I wanted that I wanted to be wanted I wanted to be needed I wanted um somebody to come on but I get beautiful just out the blue yeah beautiful I couldn't live without you man if you was my woman and that's partly why a lot of older women around my age and older I'll see it at the club's all naked and freaky deaky you have a sex or really Milly and all these different things because they want validation it's not like I'm 25 and I'm going out to nightclubs and I'm like concerned with like trying to be cool and it's like I don't know what my passion is and I don't know what I want to do with my life and I'm still in that phase where you're attracted to like [ __ ] guys and stuff I think that being in your 40s makes you more grateful it makes you more aware of every day and the beauty of being given another day and to not take any day for granted I just feel like the older and wiser the idea of being older and wiser really is true if we know what life is like man why aren't we why aren't we telling them what we know man why are we pulling them to the side says hey you know what young man young lady this is what life about is about man you know you're 21 you're 22 here in the next 10-15 years this is what you're gonna be experiencing I mean that they may rebel man but like I said before man they're wanting that guidance man another good thing about being 40 and now I don't know if this is true for everyone is that when I was 20 I was a little bit of an [ __ ] now that I'm 40 I [ __ ] I'm not an [ __ ] anymore now this I'm reminded of cuz I follow a lot of little [ __ ] on Instagram and they're still in that phase where they're like I'm young I'm gonna do what's right for me and [ __ ] everyone else and then it's super cool not to give a [ __ ] there's still in that face and I remember being in that fair so I've got nothing but love for you you little [ __ ] as me and you know why aren't we going to the young guy saying hey you know what man you know it's cool to be smart man it's it's cool to read man it's cool to expand your mind and I just feel like we're dropping the ball man we're really setting them up for failure man and I think that one of the responsibilities of being 40 is it is being able to you know look back and explain to them hey this is what life is about thank you for watching I'll see you soon leave a comments down there well the happy birthday one so that's nice but leave your comments in general what do you feel how you feel way thought you'd be at the age you wanna be call the read thank so much as ridiculous as that montage may have been it gives you a sense of the range of the opinions you can find on the internet on the topic of turning 40 and let me tell you something if you search around instead for videos on the topic of what it's like to turn 16 or what it's like to turn 21 you are gonna find many many more opinions here on YouTube there are very very few people who've taken the time to come on camera and talk about what it's like to turn 40 because not too many of us are youtubers are preserving our life sharing it with the public for the people to scrutinize at age 40 be that as it may what I looked at the history of my own youtube channel here it's always been striking to me that one of my most successful videos of all time is simply me talking about why I don't drink alcohol and that tells you something but the social function of the Internet in YouTube in particular 2018 I told the anecdote recently on this channel about a friend of mine it became vegan and when she decided to become vegan she had this shocking short-term experience where she opened a box of chicken chicken meat and happened to be accidentally some chicken feathers left in there but who did she turn to for help or guidance after she had this horrifying discovery she didn't go to her priest she didn't go to work father or her uncle shouldn't go to a Buddhist monk she to go to some traditional authority figure she came here on YouTube and started looking for advice and this led her eventually to make the decision to become vegan so in same way there were people a 22,000 people most of them never heard of me before most of them never watched my videos gonna have to work twenty-two thousand people came to my channel to hear me talk for eighteen minutes about why I don't drink alcohol um what goes into that decision was tied up to that in my life so whatever else I reflected on that video so you know this some truth those reflections that were that were edited into that montage that part of what's going on here is indeed the older generation sharing their experiences and passing on some kind of guidance and advice to the younger generation what else do we have in the video look I'm not trying to make any of these people look ridiculous but sure there are different moments in there I laugh that um it sure is ridiculous to hear that what really matters they forty is I don't know how attractive you are how great your sex life is or how well you've been able to you know manage some kind of concoction of healing elixirs diet and Botox births but you know something else have mentioned here on YouTube is that you know I did live long enough in life that I managed to read one of the major works of Aristotle Aristotle the ancient Greek philosopher I managed to read his book simply titled politics back when I was about 19 years old and then of the reading again now at age 39 going on 40 and I'm someone who is both blessed and cursed with a very accurate memory it's a curse because traumatic experiences in your life stay with you more vividly than someone who can just forget someone who maybe just remembers the outlines of things but while reading that work of aristotle's now and what I see in it what I appreciate in it what I criticize about it what I can excoriate about it how I see the structure of the text the content of the text the way I make leaps of inference about the intention of the author the way I see it as a product of its social and historical context all of that has changed so much and I'm confronted with the memory of the man I was or the boy I was at age 19 when I read it and somebody won't be surprised by this at all it's 19 I absolutely could not get past the fact that Aristotle makes excuses for slavery and you ignored nor should I have courted anyone it's horrifying to read this guy who celebrated as a genius who's presented as the pinnacle of you know Western intellectual accomplishment making excuses for the ownership and exploitation of slaves that I still think today anyone on the schoolyard at least any high school student could refute or challenge and of course here I am age 39 and still to this day I'm dealing with similarly childish excuses for yeah you know war the brutality of governments locally and internationally but above all else as you guys know the main thing I've been involved in politics last five years have been the excuses people make for eating meat for perpetuating the culture of you know meat dairy leather etc challenging that from a vegan perspective although I've tried also in my way to challenge preconceptions that people have when they're making excuses for communism when they're making excuses for other kinds of brutality of a man against man shall we say so this is it guys forty years old I talked to a friend of me of mine a few days ago and he was explaining that he was quoting YouTube for various reasons he has aspirations to be an author spend more time writing he has a new girlfriend it's having more sex these are not reasons to quit the game you know you can have a very active sex life you can have very active intellectual life as an author as so as a reader as a student as a teacher would have you and there's not reasons to quit doing YouTube you know above all else from day one on this YouTube channel I knew what was leaving behind an artifact for my daughter to see one day because my daughter may only get to know me if I live that long when I'm in my 60s and there won't be something left behind of the man I was in my 40s in that more active time of my life and I mean I could say honestly if I was only getting 10 views per video if I was getting a tiny tiny number of viewers it would still be worthwhile for me to come here on YouTube and share the ridiculous contradictions and struggles that are ongoing in my life so guys whether you subscribe or not whether you can watch minutes or not but he's far beyond patreon or not I think I can say and I'll deal honestly we don't know what's gonna happen with technology in the future the internet but for me looking forward despite all the real harm and sorrow that YouTube has brought into my life as it has has brought a lot I can say I feel more committed than ever to to try to share the the unexpected developments in my life my only philosophy experience whatever it is about this you're on the Internet thanks for tuning in bye-bye I mean really people like to disrespect my truth but the fact is that you know my name is I don't know you I vanished en