Gaining Weight: Freelee's Diet Delusion. (vegan / vegans / veganism)
10 May 2016 [link youtube]
A conversation about much more than just weight-gain with Lea P., who attended last year's Thai Fruit Festival, and who will be in Chiang Mai again this year.
Youtube Automatic Transcription
and since it was so low fat I was just
like never feeling satisfied I gained 15 kilos in a very short amount of time and I could be up at some point I was eating up to 5,000 calories but I guess like the 3,500 to 4,000 inch was like more than average whatever to do how was that in response to freelee's advice at that stage when you were thinking that you know 4,000 calories was fine all you need to stop yourself because if you don't do that you're not doing the diet fight or if you just need one day not enough or you don't feel cool all the time you're gonna get metabolic damage like stupid [ __ ] like that yeah it's like kind of religious you could compare to some kind of religious belief where you have to like sing for your past or something like that you actually were already interested in raw foodism before you got involved with freelee's diets so for you you actually went from a raw food diet to the raw so Florida yeah I actually have the beginning I didn't even understand her accent so yeah sure I'm sure you've improved your English by listening to durianrider and freely swearing a lot you learned a lot of curse words learning English with freelee and durianrider - yen vote compared did you learn a little bit of how to read and write the Thai language like you know I know I know it's hard but yeah okay well that's the funny thing so most people say reading and writing Thai is very very difficult which you can see just from the science like it's it's not simple but I mean I'm in the one class of people for whom it's easy I had already studied the ancient languages so Pali and Sanskrit are these ancient languages for the the region so it's really funny but what all the other foreigners find difficult and even what type eople find difficult in the reading rich for me was easy so it's huge advantage with the reading writing system and I say to people well it's like if you go to Europe and you've already studied Latin and Greek you know and then learning here but of course everything's so much easier because I had to study Latin at school so I got to a level where I was starting to do like the original text like Caesar and that kind of stuff and I like it is the basis for everything in Europe basically well okay but me so that's really interesting so Lia I didn't know this about you you've got like five languages okay but what cuz it's how like I know I know the Roman Rite in Japanese and we're not we're not counting Thai but if you wanted to you could add when when you're applying for a university you could add tied your listen you can exaggerate that one it's okay but that's no but that's interesting so your are you are you twenty years old now or what you're about okay well look you've got a you've got a lot of advantages in life then that's great I mean I'm happy I thing is I say I'm happy for you actually I'm sad for you because I know how much work it is to study languages you know and and and you know with with any one of those languages you don't know how much will it be part of your future or what have you okay cool so look the the subject for this this conversation I want to talk to you a little bit about was um you know gaining weight on high fruit diet which is in some ways a taboo topic I'd like to think just during the last yeah just during the last one year though I think people have gotten a lot more honest about it like it's gone from being a secret to being some people recognized as important I need to need to talk about so mostly I'm gonna I'm gonna listen to you I'll ask some questions to prod you along I would say in general I think the people for whom the high carb low fat diet works the best are the people who do not follow the diet you know like people who just in general like if in general you think eating a lot of fruit is good and eating a lot of vegetables is good but you don't actually follow this diet you're not you're not for example eating 3,000 calories a day with no exercise or what have you but you you just have a sensible approach then that can work but I so am interesting story I'll just ask you how did you first get into high carb low fat or high fruit because I think you had a you had a fruitarian period right and and what your experience was yeah I came from the headaches that I had before so constant headaches migraines so for me it was more about health it was never about losing weight I also did not come from a restrictive past not all and I think that's kinda important because so many people are coming from an eating disorder to rot so for any veganism whatever so also Freeling during I did not make me go vegan so I founded raw foods high carb raw food thing and so when raw vegan for half a year and I had no weight but I was and but at the same time I was really hard to get in enough calories since fruit is so low in calories and I was exercising substantially I was doing figure skating three times a week usually between two and three hours at the time and that in general is just an active person and we had like sports at school walking a lot I'm from a village I like I walked out if you work more or less suggest a job so that's interesting though but in your first six months where you went raw food and we're eating a lot of fruit obviously during the first six months though you actually you actually did not gain weight during that stage because the excuse right you lost weight your nose yeah lost a little today because I was like I had good body shape I was healthy weight skinny whatever you want to call it never had issues with weight so going raw had I lost a little bit away it's like a few kilos or so then at some point I guess I was just like eating to low fat even at the rough raw vegan diet so reintroduced oil gained a few kilos and then after having half a year of like the the raw foods period I actually include cooked food into my diet didn't know oil and since it was solar fat I was just like never feeling satisfied again probably if 15 kilos within a very short amount of time and I could eat up at some points I was eating up to 5,000 calories but I guess like the 3,500 to 4,000 ish was like more to average what I was eating so just wait how did you get on the tide then was that in response to freelee's advice at that stage when you were thinking that you know 4,000 calories was fine okay yeah yeah I actually like I got this idea in my head that like I had this unhealthy past of like my headaches and I was drinking a lot of coffee before going vegan to be functioning since I couldn't sleep well with the headaches and it was like a downward spiral and it was just like not much to do um so I thought oh my god it's probably I have to pay for my past and oh you need to stuff yourself because if you don't do that you're not doing the diet right or if you just eat one day not enough or you don't feel full all the time you're gonna get metabolic damage like stupid [ __ ] like that yeah well it's interesting the metabolic damage for one thing for one thing this whole approach encourages the mentality that anytime you feel sleepy anytime you feel like you don't have enough energy you should eat more and you should eat more high calorie high sugar food so that already to me that's a type of eating disorder like I know it's not as serious as you and me it's not as serious as anorexia but still people who eat compulsively that way were you know whenever you're feeling rundown you feel like you don't you're not energetic to blame that on oh I need more glucose and to me that's that's already in healthy and I think one of the thing nobody else seems to take this seriously I have I have at least one video where I do take this seriously for these young women there was a young woman who used to be a model and then she's not modeling anymore because it was that so you know the the idea of metabolic damage like oh well you're only gaining this weight for a few years and when you're talking about like age 19 to 21 that's a big part of a young person's life you know like you know I mean for me if it's 37 to 39 but you know then I think you know nobody seems to take seriously this is something that really does damage people's lives I mean the difference between being you know of being overweight for those couple of years in the prime of your life it can influence you in all kinds for one thing it can destroy your career in sports if you know if you really are serious about sport or couldn't you destroy your career as a model for the the woman it was a model so you say people seem to not take that seriously as if metabolic damage is if it doesn't matter just because it has this this fancy name yeah it's like kind of religious you could compare it to some kind of religious belief where you have to like sing for your past or something like that like repay yeah so for you you there's some part to it because you obviously damaged your body in the past and I I was like suffering from the headaches but that shouldn't necessarily show in my weight so just wonder though your headaches I know you had doctors involved were those diagnosed as being related to dairy in your diet or was there no clear diagnosis because many migrant headaches are related to you know cheese and dairy so I just asked my doctors didn't find anything I went to different neurologists I'm at some point I got like I did a headache calendar or whatever you want to call it where I was just like for a full year I was filling out every day how I was feeling and the headaches also include like light sensitivity like I couldn't stand if there was some kind of light in a room in front of me especially um natural light was really hard for me I would sometimes even get like just dizzy from it like really bad but um okay good so I was just asking if that was known to be diet related or further unrelated so think so correctly from wrong but I think for some people even though freelee's diet is crazy they think it must be working because it helps them with some other health conditions we were wrong but I imagine that for you and for people like you the feeling is well my headaches got better so the diet must be good it must be right I must stick with it and I must believe in all the other things because there's this one symptom that got better would you when you say it's true yeah like when I first switch to cooked food I got a setback I'd say in my headaches because I was I guess my gut flora wasn't used to the to the starches and I had a problem with rice for sometimes like I remember one time I ain't like I didn't have fruits I just ate like rice and vegetables and I got a migraine for a whole week that was not awesome now I don't have any problem with it whatsoever but yeah like not too for it can improve other symptoms so people just take it as a given oh yeah just like I'm just gonna gain weight for a while but I got better in like another part of my life that was wrong before well you know I'm hennya of the channel hennya mania this is my interpretation of her but she had a number of health problems that she thought the raw tell for diet had cured so way back so a couple years ago she was a believer because she switched diets and then these health problems went away but eventually what she figured out was no the health problems came back again like you know they just gotten better or temporarily and they didn't really relate to the diet and the diet problems but I think for her I think it took her several years to to get rid of that impression where she felt this diet had cured me therefore this diet has all the answers and therefore even if it's 3,000 calories a day she should she should follow the other elements of the diet for you correct me wrong you you actually were already interested in raw foodism before you got involved with freelee's diet so for you you actually went from a raw food diet to the righto for diet okay that's unusual one yeah yeah I actually at the beginning I didn't even understand her accent so yeah I just couldn't watch the videos for a while sure I'm sure you've improved your English by listening to durianrider and freely swearing a lot you learned a lot of curse words learning English with freelee and durianrider or one or one ingles so at what point did you did you stop believing or when did he start to question the kind of freely program because I mean obviously the weight gain alone so I mean once she was at some point you notice that you were gaining weight was that what made you question it or was it a totally unrelated issue not at all because I as I said before I thought he was just part of the healing process and like I never really cared about my weight and since the diet so to speak gave me like my life back in assert in a way it didn't matter to me so then so my question is then when did you start to question the the basic ideas that I was built on what I mean was it just did you read something or did you just think about it and what what happened like I always was aware that like it didn't satisfy me and I figured out it was like too long fed because I was doing 1995 five four most of the time and I think it's way too low especially for a young person yeah did you have any of the other problems that did you lose your period due to the very low fat content or any other health problems or no you did okay no I had generally my helping proof it was just the weight gain basically Morland all right because I didn't really put any weight like my health was so much more important to me than my weight so I didn't really care so it was like even if it was even if I didn't feel satisfied it gave me so much more else back for my life about about one year ago today I think you were still kind of a true believer in free lien so I mean good incredibly if I'm wrong so I'm guessing so during the last year you've been living in Asia and you've been thinking about things different angles so what what what do you think has changed you can just speak more generally what do you think is changed in your life for your understanding during the last year it's just more experience looking at different people not just being influenced by one person starting to think bit more myself basic stuff and also probably that I just didn't really lose any weight but my health like but my health was fine so um like I had my health back any willow doesn't look like that super awesome effects is it wasn't just like a week ago that a family felt better so that we're off that like priority and the help like the wait one rice let's say he started to question up it's interesting I mean I had one person writing into me one fan of my channel and she gained a lot of weight I forget but more than 40 pounds she gained a lot of weight over a long time on high carb low fat so over years and years but I would guess I mean for her the combination of I have to do this it's good for my health even if when I look in the mirror I'm getting fatter and fatter instead of getting thinner but also right well but doesn't exist um but but then also I mean this is paired with like emotionally I'm saving the world like this is morally good this is the way to save the world this is the way to cure cancer this is the way to save the environment so think that combination of being beautiful being strong saving the world it's quite a I mean it for a young person it's influential but actually the woman who wrote to me she's of more than 40 years old so even for her I mean this was this was quite a powerful kind of you know religious experience this combination of things yeah I'm happy for you in some ways me at the start of this conversation I learned you've really kind of turned around your experience in Thailand and made it into an educational opportunity I mean if you're getting a basis I mean that sincerely studying Japanese and just having the experience of living in Thailand I hope you're getting something positive out of it but I mean at the time correct me if I'm wrong but I think you were also influenced by freely enduring writer I at the time were you were you planning to never go back to high school were you planning to stay dropped out of school or did it influence the way you thought about your own future that way and and your reasons for being in Thailand or being in Asia has that changed or not if it if it hasn't you can say it's fine lots of things have changed for me like I always had issues with my family so there's like a little bit of let's call it in a very minor way like conflict so for me going to town was like like ecstasy like an emotional level so fruit and for me like since I my experience in school was the best with the headaches and changing schools and like the new school I went was like a complete waste of time because I didn't have to study the whole year to pass with decent grades so it was just like why am I wasting my time in school when I'm not even learning anything combined with the ecstasy feeling of the of the festival it was it seemed stupid to me to go back to to that so I stayed and dropped out of high school went to travel around Southeast Asia Indonesia iSight Singapore I cycle through Malaysia and I came back to to Chiang Mai since that was like where the happy feelings came from um obviously when I came back he wasn't the same as the festival since there wasn't as many people it was like more of a normal kind of thing um yeah look may I just say it's interesting but I mean now obviously I mean in some ways it's a very negative experience in life but you've gained some new perspective on it and I mean I think I think you are actually coming out of this a lot you know richer for the experience in some sense but I mean I think it's interesting with the next Thai fruit festival coming up I think you'll be able to look back and compare how different you are as a person you know one year ago versus now and it sounds to me now like you do have some idea for your own long-term future and you know Asia and Asian languages are gonna be a part of it which I can relate to because that's that's how I felt when I was younger too you know and and that you know ultimately getting an education and getting a job as a part of it but you know meanwhile is to say other people are ice do you see them dropping at a school talked about that repeatedly on my channel and kind of worshiping this being on vacation forever or thing it's like well you know somebody somebody has to be a medical doctor somebody has to go to school and work in a hospital somebody you know all the things that make life possible all those respectable roles all that responsibility it's still it's still waiting for you and you know not everyone can live like durianrider and not everyone wants to so yeah I try to talk about that stuff okay pretty horrible I mean from drug use to welfare and everything it's just recently that he like turned his life around yeah I've said that on my channel many times like if you were my own brother you know I would just say I'm so happy for you like I'm so happy you got off the drugs I'm so happy you're not homeless I'm so happy you're not in jail and that would be hit but he's in a very strangely influential position over people who you know one way or another are kind of weak enough to fall under his spell which you know people get like hooked on to them when they were in some kind of like emotionally unstable place and that's why they look up to them because they they give them direction they give them like hope they give them a mission to give them purpose so that's why I think also people are so like so extreme in their way of like sticking to them even if they say something completely ridiculous and disrespectful or or even if they just gained 20 pounds or gained 15 kilos or were they they're ignoring that it's so much because it like you think it gave you so much money value right Wow once it again like attitude of gratitude [ __ ] up harden to [ __ ] up no excuses just do it that kind of like right and that that also leads ultimately to victim blaming because if you're fat it's your fault it can't be freelee's fault it can't be the diet's fault you should feel bad etc etc yeah so I'll just measure manipulated or anything or just like made some believe or or just you know you may have a job where you can't burn 3000 calories a day you know not everyone is doing long-distance cycling I I've mentioned in my channel I used to do long-distance cycling in Thailand and it's true you can burn a ton of calories just the sweating even more than the muscularis is the heat but you know if you if you sit at a desk reading books all day you can't you can't hold down that place though and I was just gonna measure I think it's funny the contrast because many of the people who endorse freelee and durianrider where they they kind of promote them and they they want their own YouTube channel to be promoted to their friends they don't follow the high carb low fat diet they're vegans like all the body builders including the ones who are personal friends with durianrider they're all tracking their macros you know keeping their calorie count low keeping their protein intake high so it's a protein limited carbohydrate limited calorie diet that they're not eating unlimited carbohydrates they're eating limited cover and I'm not you know for me the main thing that's appealing about having a lot of fruit in your diet is that you're doing less cooking and for me I live alone I don't really want to cook a complex pasta and then sit and eat it alone you know like to me it's kind of one so I just say there were other reasons that have nothing no weight loss you know for why I eat a lot of fruit or why why other people might be drawn to a fruitarian or high carb high carb low fat lifestyle so hmm anyway cool I wanted to keep this this interview relatively short so shall we stop it here from my perspective I'm gonna see you in Chiang Mai in a couple of weeks because we're both going to be in Thailand so I'm eight I may wear a disguise so that you know during Ryder's followers don't have me down so I don't know I'll get I'll get some get some big sunglasses or something but in that great great talking Yulia and again I'm learned a lot of things about you talking now that I didn't know before and I'm really happy for you so you know and maybe both of us maybe Japanese we part of our futures and maybe Thailand to be part of our futures but you know stay in touch that I hope all the time on my channel though the whole hard it is to know five people you can cooperate with and you know how hard is to keep in touch with people when you're a nomad when you live in countries so I hope you're one of the five people I still know five years from now
like never feeling satisfied I gained 15 kilos in a very short amount of time and I could be up at some point I was eating up to 5,000 calories but I guess like the 3,500 to 4,000 inch was like more than average whatever to do how was that in response to freelee's advice at that stage when you were thinking that you know 4,000 calories was fine all you need to stop yourself because if you don't do that you're not doing the diet fight or if you just need one day not enough or you don't feel cool all the time you're gonna get metabolic damage like stupid [ __ ] like that yeah it's like kind of religious you could compare to some kind of religious belief where you have to like sing for your past or something like that you actually were already interested in raw foodism before you got involved with freelee's diets so for you you actually went from a raw food diet to the raw so Florida yeah I actually have the beginning I didn't even understand her accent so yeah sure I'm sure you've improved your English by listening to durianrider and freely swearing a lot you learned a lot of curse words learning English with freelee and durianrider - yen vote compared did you learn a little bit of how to read and write the Thai language like you know I know I know it's hard but yeah okay well that's the funny thing so most people say reading and writing Thai is very very difficult which you can see just from the science like it's it's not simple but I mean I'm in the one class of people for whom it's easy I had already studied the ancient languages so Pali and Sanskrit are these ancient languages for the the region so it's really funny but what all the other foreigners find difficult and even what type eople find difficult in the reading rich for me was easy so it's huge advantage with the reading writing system and I say to people well it's like if you go to Europe and you've already studied Latin and Greek you know and then learning here but of course everything's so much easier because I had to study Latin at school so I got to a level where I was starting to do like the original text like Caesar and that kind of stuff and I like it is the basis for everything in Europe basically well okay but me so that's really interesting so Lia I didn't know this about you you've got like five languages okay but what cuz it's how like I know I know the Roman Rite in Japanese and we're not we're not counting Thai but if you wanted to you could add when when you're applying for a university you could add tied your listen you can exaggerate that one it's okay but that's no but that's interesting so your are you are you twenty years old now or what you're about okay well look you've got a you've got a lot of advantages in life then that's great I mean I'm happy I thing is I say I'm happy for you actually I'm sad for you because I know how much work it is to study languages you know and and and you know with with any one of those languages you don't know how much will it be part of your future or what have you okay cool so look the the subject for this this conversation I want to talk to you a little bit about was um you know gaining weight on high fruit diet which is in some ways a taboo topic I'd like to think just during the last yeah just during the last one year though I think people have gotten a lot more honest about it like it's gone from being a secret to being some people recognized as important I need to need to talk about so mostly I'm gonna I'm gonna listen to you I'll ask some questions to prod you along I would say in general I think the people for whom the high carb low fat diet works the best are the people who do not follow the diet you know like people who just in general like if in general you think eating a lot of fruit is good and eating a lot of vegetables is good but you don't actually follow this diet you're not you're not for example eating 3,000 calories a day with no exercise or what have you but you you just have a sensible approach then that can work but I so am interesting story I'll just ask you how did you first get into high carb low fat or high fruit because I think you had a you had a fruitarian period right and and what your experience was yeah I came from the headaches that I had before so constant headaches migraines so for me it was more about health it was never about losing weight I also did not come from a restrictive past not all and I think that's kinda important because so many people are coming from an eating disorder to rot so for any veganism whatever so also Freeling during I did not make me go vegan so I founded raw foods high carb raw food thing and so when raw vegan for half a year and I had no weight but I was and but at the same time I was really hard to get in enough calories since fruit is so low in calories and I was exercising substantially I was doing figure skating three times a week usually between two and three hours at the time and that in general is just an active person and we had like sports at school walking a lot I'm from a village I like I walked out if you work more or less suggest a job so that's interesting though but in your first six months where you went raw food and we're eating a lot of fruit obviously during the first six months though you actually you actually did not gain weight during that stage because the excuse right you lost weight your nose yeah lost a little today because I was like I had good body shape I was healthy weight skinny whatever you want to call it never had issues with weight so going raw had I lost a little bit away it's like a few kilos or so then at some point I guess I was just like eating to low fat even at the rough raw vegan diet so reintroduced oil gained a few kilos and then after having half a year of like the the raw foods period I actually include cooked food into my diet didn't know oil and since it was solar fat I was just like never feeling satisfied again probably if 15 kilos within a very short amount of time and I could eat up at some points I was eating up to 5,000 calories but I guess like the 3,500 to 4,000 ish was like more to average what I was eating so just wait how did you get on the tide then was that in response to freelee's advice at that stage when you were thinking that you know 4,000 calories was fine okay yeah yeah I actually like I got this idea in my head that like I had this unhealthy past of like my headaches and I was drinking a lot of coffee before going vegan to be functioning since I couldn't sleep well with the headaches and it was like a downward spiral and it was just like not much to do um so I thought oh my god it's probably I have to pay for my past and oh you need to stuff yourself because if you don't do that you're not doing the diet right or if you just eat one day not enough or you don't feel full all the time you're gonna get metabolic damage like stupid [ __ ] like that yeah well it's interesting the metabolic damage for one thing for one thing this whole approach encourages the mentality that anytime you feel sleepy anytime you feel like you don't have enough energy you should eat more and you should eat more high calorie high sugar food so that already to me that's a type of eating disorder like I know it's not as serious as you and me it's not as serious as anorexia but still people who eat compulsively that way were you know whenever you're feeling rundown you feel like you don't you're not energetic to blame that on oh I need more glucose and to me that's that's already in healthy and I think one of the thing nobody else seems to take this seriously I have I have at least one video where I do take this seriously for these young women there was a young woman who used to be a model and then she's not modeling anymore because it was that so you know the the idea of metabolic damage like oh well you're only gaining this weight for a few years and when you're talking about like age 19 to 21 that's a big part of a young person's life you know like you know I mean for me if it's 37 to 39 but you know then I think you know nobody seems to take seriously this is something that really does damage people's lives I mean the difference between being you know of being overweight for those couple of years in the prime of your life it can influence you in all kinds for one thing it can destroy your career in sports if you know if you really are serious about sport or couldn't you destroy your career as a model for the the woman it was a model so you say people seem to not take that seriously as if metabolic damage is if it doesn't matter just because it has this this fancy name yeah it's like kind of religious you could compare it to some kind of religious belief where you have to like sing for your past or something like that like repay yeah so for you you there's some part to it because you obviously damaged your body in the past and I I was like suffering from the headaches but that shouldn't necessarily show in my weight so just wonder though your headaches I know you had doctors involved were those diagnosed as being related to dairy in your diet or was there no clear diagnosis because many migrant headaches are related to you know cheese and dairy so I just asked my doctors didn't find anything I went to different neurologists I'm at some point I got like I did a headache calendar or whatever you want to call it where I was just like for a full year I was filling out every day how I was feeling and the headaches also include like light sensitivity like I couldn't stand if there was some kind of light in a room in front of me especially um natural light was really hard for me I would sometimes even get like just dizzy from it like really bad but um okay good so I was just asking if that was known to be diet related or further unrelated so think so correctly from wrong but I think for some people even though freelee's diet is crazy they think it must be working because it helps them with some other health conditions we were wrong but I imagine that for you and for people like you the feeling is well my headaches got better so the diet must be good it must be right I must stick with it and I must believe in all the other things because there's this one symptom that got better would you when you say it's true yeah like when I first switch to cooked food I got a setback I'd say in my headaches because I was I guess my gut flora wasn't used to the to the starches and I had a problem with rice for sometimes like I remember one time I ain't like I didn't have fruits I just ate like rice and vegetables and I got a migraine for a whole week that was not awesome now I don't have any problem with it whatsoever but yeah like not too for it can improve other symptoms so people just take it as a given oh yeah just like I'm just gonna gain weight for a while but I got better in like another part of my life that was wrong before well you know I'm hennya of the channel hennya mania this is my interpretation of her but she had a number of health problems that she thought the raw tell for diet had cured so way back so a couple years ago she was a believer because she switched diets and then these health problems went away but eventually what she figured out was no the health problems came back again like you know they just gotten better or temporarily and they didn't really relate to the diet and the diet problems but I think for her I think it took her several years to to get rid of that impression where she felt this diet had cured me therefore this diet has all the answers and therefore even if it's 3,000 calories a day she should she should follow the other elements of the diet for you correct me wrong you you actually were already interested in raw foodism before you got involved with freelee's diet so for you you actually went from a raw food diet to the righto for diet okay that's unusual one yeah yeah I actually at the beginning I didn't even understand her accent so yeah I just couldn't watch the videos for a while sure I'm sure you've improved your English by listening to durianrider and freely swearing a lot you learned a lot of curse words learning English with freelee and durianrider or one or one ingles so at what point did you did you stop believing or when did he start to question the kind of freely program because I mean obviously the weight gain alone so I mean once she was at some point you notice that you were gaining weight was that what made you question it or was it a totally unrelated issue not at all because I as I said before I thought he was just part of the healing process and like I never really cared about my weight and since the diet so to speak gave me like my life back in assert in a way it didn't matter to me so then so my question is then when did you start to question the the basic ideas that I was built on what I mean was it just did you read something or did you just think about it and what what happened like I always was aware that like it didn't satisfy me and I figured out it was like too long fed because I was doing 1995 five four most of the time and I think it's way too low especially for a young person yeah did you have any of the other problems that did you lose your period due to the very low fat content or any other health problems or no you did okay no I had generally my helping proof it was just the weight gain basically Morland all right because I didn't really put any weight like my health was so much more important to me than my weight so I didn't really care so it was like even if it was even if I didn't feel satisfied it gave me so much more else back for my life about about one year ago today I think you were still kind of a true believer in free lien so I mean good incredibly if I'm wrong so I'm guessing so during the last year you've been living in Asia and you've been thinking about things different angles so what what what do you think has changed you can just speak more generally what do you think is changed in your life for your understanding during the last year it's just more experience looking at different people not just being influenced by one person starting to think bit more myself basic stuff and also probably that I just didn't really lose any weight but my health like but my health was fine so um like I had my health back any willow doesn't look like that super awesome effects is it wasn't just like a week ago that a family felt better so that we're off that like priority and the help like the wait one rice let's say he started to question up it's interesting I mean I had one person writing into me one fan of my channel and she gained a lot of weight I forget but more than 40 pounds she gained a lot of weight over a long time on high carb low fat so over years and years but I would guess I mean for her the combination of I have to do this it's good for my health even if when I look in the mirror I'm getting fatter and fatter instead of getting thinner but also right well but doesn't exist um but but then also I mean this is paired with like emotionally I'm saving the world like this is morally good this is the way to save the world this is the way to cure cancer this is the way to save the environment so think that combination of being beautiful being strong saving the world it's quite a I mean it for a young person it's influential but actually the woman who wrote to me she's of more than 40 years old so even for her I mean this was this was quite a powerful kind of you know religious experience this combination of things yeah I'm happy for you in some ways me at the start of this conversation I learned you've really kind of turned around your experience in Thailand and made it into an educational opportunity I mean if you're getting a basis I mean that sincerely studying Japanese and just having the experience of living in Thailand I hope you're getting something positive out of it but I mean at the time correct me if I'm wrong but I think you were also influenced by freely enduring writer I at the time were you were you planning to never go back to high school were you planning to stay dropped out of school or did it influence the way you thought about your own future that way and and your reasons for being in Thailand or being in Asia has that changed or not if it if it hasn't you can say it's fine lots of things have changed for me like I always had issues with my family so there's like a little bit of let's call it in a very minor way like conflict so for me going to town was like like ecstasy like an emotional level so fruit and for me like since I my experience in school was the best with the headaches and changing schools and like the new school I went was like a complete waste of time because I didn't have to study the whole year to pass with decent grades so it was just like why am I wasting my time in school when I'm not even learning anything combined with the ecstasy feeling of the of the festival it was it seemed stupid to me to go back to to that so I stayed and dropped out of high school went to travel around Southeast Asia Indonesia iSight Singapore I cycle through Malaysia and I came back to to Chiang Mai since that was like where the happy feelings came from um obviously when I came back he wasn't the same as the festival since there wasn't as many people it was like more of a normal kind of thing um yeah look may I just say it's interesting but I mean now obviously I mean in some ways it's a very negative experience in life but you've gained some new perspective on it and I mean I think I think you are actually coming out of this a lot you know richer for the experience in some sense but I mean I think it's interesting with the next Thai fruit festival coming up I think you'll be able to look back and compare how different you are as a person you know one year ago versus now and it sounds to me now like you do have some idea for your own long-term future and you know Asia and Asian languages are gonna be a part of it which I can relate to because that's that's how I felt when I was younger too you know and and that you know ultimately getting an education and getting a job as a part of it but you know meanwhile is to say other people are ice do you see them dropping at a school talked about that repeatedly on my channel and kind of worshiping this being on vacation forever or thing it's like well you know somebody somebody has to be a medical doctor somebody has to go to school and work in a hospital somebody you know all the things that make life possible all those respectable roles all that responsibility it's still it's still waiting for you and you know not everyone can live like durianrider and not everyone wants to so yeah I try to talk about that stuff okay pretty horrible I mean from drug use to welfare and everything it's just recently that he like turned his life around yeah I've said that on my channel many times like if you were my own brother you know I would just say I'm so happy for you like I'm so happy you got off the drugs I'm so happy you're not homeless I'm so happy you're not in jail and that would be hit but he's in a very strangely influential position over people who you know one way or another are kind of weak enough to fall under his spell which you know people get like hooked on to them when they were in some kind of like emotionally unstable place and that's why they look up to them because they they give them direction they give them like hope they give them a mission to give them purpose so that's why I think also people are so like so extreme in their way of like sticking to them even if they say something completely ridiculous and disrespectful or or even if they just gained 20 pounds or gained 15 kilos or were they they're ignoring that it's so much because it like you think it gave you so much money value right Wow once it again like attitude of gratitude [ __ ] up harden to [ __ ] up no excuses just do it that kind of like right and that that also leads ultimately to victim blaming because if you're fat it's your fault it can't be freelee's fault it can't be the diet's fault you should feel bad etc etc yeah so I'll just measure manipulated or anything or just like made some believe or or just you know you may have a job where you can't burn 3000 calories a day you know not everyone is doing long-distance cycling I I've mentioned in my channel I used to do long-distance cycling in Thailand and it's true you can burn a ton of calories just the sweating even more than the muscularis is the heat but you know if you if you sit at a desk reading books all day you can't you can't hold down that place though and I was just gonna measure I think it's funny the contrast because many of the people who endorse freelee and durianrider where they they kind of promote them and they they want their own YouTube channel to be promoted to their friends they don't follow the high carb low fat diet they're vegans like all the body builders including the ones who are personal friends with durianrider they're all tracking their macros you know keeping their calorie count low keeping their protein intake high so it's a protein limited carbohydrate limited calorie diet that they're not eating unlimited carbohydrates they're eating limited cover and I'm not you know for me the main thing that's appealing about having a lot of fruit in your diet is that you're doing less cooking and for me I live alone I don't really want to cook a complex pasta and then sit and eat it alone you know like to me it's kind of one so I just say there were other reasons that have nothing no weight loss you know for why I eat a lot of fruit or why why other people might be drawn to a fruitarian or high carb high carb low fat lifestyle so hmm anyway cool I wanted to keep this this interview relatively short so shall we stop it here from my perspective I'm gonna see you in Chiang Mai in a couple of weeks because we're both going to be in Thailand so I'm eight I may wear a disguise so that you know during Ryder's followers don't have me down so I don't know I'll get I'll get some get some big sunglasses or something but in that great great talking Yulia and again I'm learned a lot of things about you talking now that I didn't know before and I'm really happy for you so you know and maybe both of us maybe Japanese we part of our futures and maybe Thailand to be part of our futures but you know stay in touch that I hope all the time on my channel though the whole hard it is to know five people you can cooperate with and you know how hard is to keep in touch with people when you're a nomad when you live in countries so I hope you're one of the five people I still know five years from now