Getting Disrespected by Your Mom: Vegan Mind Tricks.

in white western english-speaking
cultures I really do think women get this kind of treatment worse than men and it's harder for them to deal with it it's harder for them to deal with it either confrontationally or not confrontationally you know the kind of needling treatment women get the kind of openly contemptuous and dismissive treatment women get and the assumption that you can just keep insulting someone to their face and they're not gonna stand up and walk out of the room or stand up and turn over the table this is not about respect my authority this isn't a very real sense about respect my my subjectivity and badness yen hey guys it's been a couple years since I said this on the channel but I used to say all the time then we talked about the cultural clash surrounding egoism I really think that in modern white Western society women have a much harder time of it than men and this example I'm gonna read you email sent to me by a patreon supporter illustrates this fact by the way you can click on the link below this video pay one dollar a month so that this channel can exist via patreon and I'm not gonna digress into extolling the relative virtues of doing this but hey is what it is so I got an email from Samantha Samantha writes to me hey eyes oh I would really appreciate if you would take a small amount of time to read this check I recently went out for my birthday at a Thai restaurant so I emphasize this is her birthday dinner it's not someone else's birthday dinner at a Thai restaurant with my family I ordered a simple dish of fried tofu with rice however it came along with egg drop soup so the point is here it was bundled with for free she got a soup that has egg in it which she didn't know she didn't realize it wasn't explained in the menu or what have you so she says she was unaware of this when she ordered it but this free soup came with her with her order I offered it to my brother and my stepmom made a comment on how quote I don't understand chickens do not die to produce eggs close quote I'm very shy and I just got kind of anxious about this I didn't want to come across as judgmental or irrational but I also wanted to tell her why this wasn't the case this led me into an anxiety attack and she followed me outside so I could relax aware that this was not very rational looking back on this i'm several things about this are irrational including her following you it's probably a great time for it'll leave you alone especially what happens and if the rest of this story I told her how chickens are killed for the production of eggs I emailed chicks being ground alive and I really just don't think she comprehended it she kept replying with stuff like quote I've had chickens before close quote and quote eggs aren't fertilized they aren't mashed up body parts of baby chicks close close I don't know if I wasn't clear about it or if she just truly didn't get what I was saying she sort of laughed saying quote one person can't make a difference close quote and she got defensive saying quote I'm not going to give up eggs if that's what you want close quote that sentence really got to me ISIL what if Rosa Parks got this kind of attitude and then just complied sitting in the back of the bus what if Martin Luther King gave up on the basic idea of ending racial segregation because of this kind of flack I'm just so tired of trying to shrug off my quote unquote lifestyle as no big deal in these kinds of you know context so look I'll continue reading this message but it's point out in white western english-speaking cultures I really do think women get this kind of treatment worse than men and it's harder for them to deal with it it's harder for them to deal with it either confrontationally or not confrontational II so I'll give you an example I don't know how old this person is writing in let's assume she's younger than I am because I'm approximately a hundred years old um you can imagine for me as a young man or for me as the old man now it's real easy if someone says something like this whether it's about eggs are about about Dairy Milk if someone says that chickens aren't aren't killed to produce eggs I can sit there and cross my arms or stare across the table other pleasent say oh yeah so they live forever do they so the chickens go on to a retirement home after they're done laying eggs what what do you imagine happens to the chickens who spend their whole life inside an aluminum box eating food out of a trough and laying an egg into a slot how does their life end how does it light how does the life and really know I mean you can imagine there's just a level of I'm sorry I mean it's in a perfect world you know men and women would be would be treated equally and you can even say just in the company of perfect friends you know sir I've had a lot of female friends that I treated exactly the same as men and some of them put up with and some of them don't I'm gonna be honest with you I think that's also why so many of my female friends have either been bisexual or lesbian because I do I do have female friends I treat them exactly the same with men and not everybody likes that kind of treatment in Western culture either but you know the kind of needling treatment women get the kind of openly contemptuous and dismissive treatment women get and the assumption that you can just keep insulting someone to their face and they're not gonna stand up and walk out of the room or stand up and turn over the table or straight up resort to a fistfight you know they're really it's weird because like I mean obviously look I'm gonna keep real with you I'm a nihilist I see peace as the shadow of war and I see most good behavior and refined manners in Western countries is very much being in the shadow of the threat of violence or at least inconvenience you know what I mean like it may not really be the threat of violence maybe just the threat of this meal is over I'm walking out you know dinner is ruined this birthday but there are consequences for misbehaving and again back when I was 16 18 or something I could get that kind of reaction to be where it was very clear to people without my having demand it either you take me seriously or there are gonna be consequences the consequence may be I walk out you never you never hear from me again you know this is not about respect my authority this isn't a very real sense about respect my my subjectivity and it is in this sense in which vegans often find a lot easier to talk about veganism as a religion I've said in a recent video of recent vegan Mind Tricks video I was talking about dealing with parents who asked you to be reasonable and quote/unquote compromise and just eat a few of meals that are made out of meat a few times a year at family gatherings at big holidays and I suggested there you can challenge people by comparing true okay so are you going to be Muslim for a few days a year if I get married to a Muslim and I convert to Islam are you willing to change your religion just just three or four times a year just for major I'll just for my convenience just to get along or are you willing to convert to Hinduism this kind of question this kind of parallelism you know in a sense it's really inadequate because the vast majority of people are members of religion just by accident of birth right they just happen to be born into a Muslim family and we're people who really chose this were people who are really passionate but it really care about it these are ethical principles that to some extent we've we've invented for ourselves and to some extent we've at least selected for ourselves so it's actually much more powerful than most forms of religious identity but you've got a fight to get it taken seriously and as you say here you've already put it in this perspective well Rosa Parks Martin Luther King jr. you know as I've said in many other videos also has anyone suffered less but nevertheless the struggle is real the suffering is very real and women it's partly for this reason as I say the kind of the shadow of the the possibility of a fistfight breaking out or just standing up or just men saying look I'm drawing the line you can't talk to me this way if you do there are consequences and the consequence may just be I walk out of this restaurant now and leave you to eat your egg your egg drop soup or whatever it is but um you know it's also this Western idea of the woman as the caregiver and the cook and the participant in the kitchen where women are put upon words like oh well you know what's Thanksgiving why don't you get in the kitchen with your auntie and your grandma and participate in basting this turkey and it's like well are you're asking me to participate in something I regard us as a you know a crying me you're asking me to participate in something our regard is immoral and that's a tension which again I think women are put in that position much much more often than men and with a real sense of scoffing not just scoffing indifference but contempt if women try to draw hard a hard moral line so I mean it's tough I mean women in Western culture are presumed be the guardians of morality there presumed to impart morality to the next generation and raising children but on the other hand it is you know the role of the preacher is presumed to be male in the role of the lawyer and the role of the the you know the Statesman a lot of these have gendered concepts you know built into them the idea of standing up for justice or your sense of what's right or what have you these do have a really gendered element to them in Western culture and sure I can absolutely say it's different in Sri Lanka I can say it's different in Taiwan I can say it's different in other cultures in some ways better and in some ways worse but in white Western english-speaking countries there's no doubt women have it a lot worse than men in exactly these most intimate and awful of situations dealing with your stepmother and your brother and this stuff around dinner table oh right I I continue I'm just so tired of trying to shrug off my so-called lifestyle as no big deal even avoiding mentioning it to others well the small efforts vegans do make a difference am I crazy getting upset over a small bowl of soup all right stop you're not upset over the bowl of soup you're upset over what your stepmother is doing you right and it's really good if you could articulate that at the time the problem isn't the bowl of soup the problem is you mom that's that's what you got to get a car you can sit in exactly those words the problem is you disrespecting me the problem is I'm drawing a line in chalk and you're crossing it and you're laughing at me and you're sneering at me the problem isn't the bowl of soup every day I walk past a thousand eggs at the grocery store you just literally walk past the display of eggs and milk to go and pick out my tofu or whatever it is I'm buying at the grocery store I got a deal with it every day every day I may drive my car past hundreds of pigs and cows going to slaughterhouses you know you see them in these trucks way to the slaughterhouse right that's an everyday thing for me so for me to have to sit at this table with a little bowl of soup isn't it that's not the problem the problem is I got a look in your eyes and deal with your disrespect and your phony-ass incomprehension you know of what this is and when you know the particular person you can give examples you can say like look you know my cousin Rory you remember he got really crazy about mountain climbing and he got you know he spent all this money to fly to India and climb a mountain and come back he was you know going and learning how to do rock climbing and then flying rather well you remember that you remember how tolerant and patient you were for figuring what that was and why that was no positive and appreciative and supportive your was that doesn't it seem to you like that's complete [ __ ] compared to what this is we're talking about here and how much it means to me now getting you may not have a cousin Rory who did mountain climbing you may have a cousin named Michael who became a compulsive gambler you know you may have your your brother Tom who became a video game addict you may have a you know a sister who you know converted to Zen Buddhism or something but you probably have some examples in the family what it's like look you took the time to understand appreciate and play some kind of positive role for this member of the family when they did some that really mattered to them that you had no comprehension of and you're not making that little bit of effort here to find out what this means to me you know obviously you are not gonna give up eating eggs and that's cuz you're a piece of [ __ ] there's the other fighting [ __ ] tension here is that's what you're not saying right what is being said is that you as the vegan are being disrespected here because you care you know it's that schoolyard thing it's really schoolyard you know nonsense where you know what school is not caring and then the kid who actually cares about something is ridiculed because they care oh gee you care about the consequences of your actions you care about the fact that chickens are being harmed and ground up to produce food that is unnecessary and healthy you care and therefore you're the butt of the joke and when you're sitting down with friends or relatives that's wrong and it's not wrong it found sense it's wrong in a shallow schoolyard sense and if you want to be respected by your own stepmom your own brother your own cousins you've got a goddamn fight and and definitely in in modern Western culture I think women have the the hardest fight of all [Music] [Music] evolution