Coronavirus: I BLAME FRANCE. #NotSatire

[Music]
it's that time people it's time to spin that wheel it's time to play that game blame the victim that's right I'm gonna say it you know who's responsible for the fact that coronavirus has been vastly more devastating in France than it was in Japan or Taiwan which are in case he hadn't seen a map right next to a trap do you know who's to blame the French one of my most common experiences living in France married to a French woman having a French child was walking into a bakery whether in the streets of Paris Marseille or nice walking into a bakery buying a loaf of bread and then insu's them at the door tearing the bread in half and throwing half of it in the garbage because the hats that had been directly handled by the Baker's assistant or cashier or whatever they directly grabbed and handled the bread with their bare hands the same hands that are handling money raw meat beef chicken the same hands that they'll use to pick something up off the floor or touch their shoes the very fundamental breakthrough of the germ theory of disease normally give it a something that marks the end of the dark ages and the beginning of the Renaissance depends on when you put it on the calendar shall we say um the germ theory of disease remains fundamentally unknown to the French and if you dare to point this out to them if you say in Paris in Nice in Marseille if you said pardon me I don't really want to eat a loaf of bread that you've directly handled with your bare hands directly coming back and forth to the cash register directly handling other groceries that include like raw eggs raw meat etc that just doesn't interest me I'm not buying a rock not buying a pet rock to put in a [ __ ] terrarium I'm buying already baked bread to put directly into my mouth it's not a banana where I can take off the banana peel all right by handling the bread in this way you've made its value go from $1 to zero I would pay to not eat it yes sometimes you throw half of the bread in the garbage that's the half you saw them handling but before you got there they were handling it the same way before they put in the Shelf the french have no concept of the germ theory of disease I've done humanitarian work in third-world countries where people are genuinely illiterate have just genuinely lacked access to education or where they're kind of learning about this stuff for the first time they're way better off than the French they are way more advanced than the French the former French colony of Cambodia the former French colony of Laos they are way ahead of the French because if you dare to point this out to the French you know what you get back ego how dare you who do you think you are to tell me how to do my job well you know what if you work in a bakery and you don't have the concept of the germ theory of disease that you have to wear plastic gloves or wash your hands or make some other serious transition that demarcates the hand that handles money at the cash register directly touches bread to pass to people but if you don't know that then guess I am in the position to tell you how to do your job because I'm living in the 21st century and you are living in the 11th century you're fully 1,000 years out of the [ __ ] loop and there are this tremendous sense of ego this tremendous sense of entitlement I remember going into a falafel shop with my ex-wife I think it was just before my ex-wife gave birth she was still pregnant we go in this falafel shop and this guy you know it's a normal thing with falafels there are several different bins for the different ingredients like raw green vegetables onions hummus like you know and then the actual falafel balls and the bread the guy is handling all of it directly with his bare hands while chatting with other people while smoking a cigarette handling the service someone else came in to give him money for something like an order or delivery or something given oh hey man you know he paused for a minute he handles them when he puts away minute eat directly with his bare fingers handling tomato he already diced pieces of wet tomato putting with the same fingers the handle the money they don't give a [ __ ] I say to my ex-wife look you can tell them or I can tell them but the reality is either we tell him or as soon as he hands us this falafel we're putting in that garbage can before we go if you want to pay him I can lose the money but what's the point just to make him feel better so we might as well tell my ex-wife had to look I'm sorry we cannot eat this falafel now I mean she was pregnant she's not in a position to just get a head cold and [ __ ] around and be be in bed with a head cold for two weeks give a huge impact on her pregnancy in her first you know who a breastfeeding the baby most of us at most times of our life just don't have two weeks to throw away even if the only risk we're taking here is the ordinary head cold just a cold not coronavirus not amoebic dysentery or the myriad other diseases you can get by handling food in an unsafe and improper way you know what in France this incredibly high-handed insulting self-righteous smug attitude about their refusal to adhere to modern standards of Hygiene modern standards of Hygiene I've seen people following again Taiwan Japan try to unit they know when I was in Taiwan they would always put on a plastic glove to handle a piece of bread before putting it in a plastic bag and you know what happened when the corona virus epidemic hit they got guidelines from the government saying no from now on you have to have a glove on both hands when you open the bag to put the prints I noticed the difference I notice the difference when I went to five month ago oh right now we got to put and you know they're not even using the other hand they only really touch the bread with one hand like oh right the government just cracked down because like in theory indirectly somehow the other hand could could touch so that you know they understand food hygiene understand the disease spreads through contact with food and that's the crucial vector here France is willing to roll out every other [ __ ] draconian repressive policy take all of people's civil rights away have the police flying drones through the sky hunting down grandmother's who are walking their dog in the park as if walking through the grass is gonna spread coronavirus when it's not handling falafels with your bare fingers handling bread with your bare fingers what goes on every day in every grocery store in France as well as every takeout food restaurant that is what spread coronavirus and this extends through all levels of education society if you have some kind of smug stereotype you're like oh well that's just poor and uneducated people no it's not it's medical doctors and nurses in hospitals at the highest level I said to one doctor straight to his [ __ ] face look I may not have a PhD but even I wash my hands before I put them inside my wife's vagina I've seen doctors smug as [ __ ] refusing to wash their hands when I interrupt them it's a I'm sorry before this vaginal exam goes any further there's a sink right there on the wall I want you to wash your hands I have gotten in the face of doctors and nurse in France and this repeatedly and they [ __ ] feel like it's part of their goddamn cultural heritage to handle the food you eat before you eat it and to put their fingers in your goddamn vagina without [ __ ] washing their hands so guess what France more than 20,000 people are going to [ __ ] die because of this [ __ ] ego trip you've been off for 500 years the germ theory of disease look it up [Music] make sure that you do me good guys cuz I come in here every single day poverty glitter sequin covered in booty shorts I do not violate the Terms of Service so they each every one of your neck both hands on the keyboard so you can enjoy the stream so you could have a good time listening to me playing with me singing with me smiling with me enjoying your life would you and Jew you do you do deserve to enjoy each and every moment of your life you enjoy and she every one of your life is worthy you guys you can do it you can be the best that you can be and we can do it together it's gonna take effort it's going to take patience it's going to take a lot a lot a lot a lot of work but if we don't try then what the [ __ ] it's stopping us from just throwing ourselves off a bridge and giving up and say yeah the planet is dying the government hates I see animals are leaving the aliens are contacting us we might be alone it just might be you and me but that's okay because you really need anyone else